Jokes

[WhyYou]

Originally Posted by Texasdrake

Speaking of jokes. I had a fave baseball cap.It had a picture of a drunk kitty cat sitting in a martini glass. the caption said " Have you ever seen a tight *****"
That cap end up disappearing one day.Think my then roommate's girlfriend threw it away.....she hated that cap. (LOL)

At one time in my working life I wore a baseball cap to work every day with a different saying taped to it. I used funny T-shirt saysings and would wait to see what everybody's reaction would be to what my hat said...there were some good and some bad and sometimes I would get nearly beaten up for what the hat said...LOL

[Texasdrake]

WhyYou thats funny. (LOL)
I did wear my cap to work one day and went into the office to get my work orders.The secretary looked at the cap and had this grin on her face.The boss came up and seen what it said and told me that it wasn't a appropriate cap to wear to work.I had this "Innocent" look on my face and said to him "What...what's wrong with a drunk cat?" and he said "You know what it really ment." and I just grin and walked out the door. (LOL)
Luckly he wasn't an ******* and fired me.

[mart]

I remember i had a t-shirt with the words " WHAT THE F*** YOU LOOKING AT?". Which i used to wear to work. How i never got beaten up i don't know lol. I did get some scared looks though. Amazing how the power of a slogan even offensive one can have.

[Texasdrake]

Funny with what kind of reactions you get from caps and T-shirts and whatever else you can prints slogans on.
I still have this spring break T-shirt I brought a long time ago...

Top Ten Reasons You Should
SHOW ME YOUR ****!

I gotten after I seen it in a Head shop and my cousin drunk wife showed me her **** when I showed her the shirt. (LOL)
I wonder if it would work on Danielle? (joking)

[tigger]

I have a tshirt. I got a cupple of years ago. It has a bear holding two owl's and sayes nice hooters. Every time i wair it i have girls stop me so they can look at it. They allways ask me where i got it.( pilot truck stop silina ks. )

[WhyYou]

A preacher concluded that his church was getting into very serious financial troubles. While checking the church storeroom, he discovered several cartons of new bibles that had never been opened and distributed.

So at his Sunday sermon, he asked for three volunteers from the congregation who would be willing to sell the bibles door-to-door for $10 each to raise the desperately needed money for the church.

Jack, Paul and Louie all raised their hands to volunteer for the task.

The minister knew that Jack and Paul earned their living as salesmen and were likely capable of selling some bibles. But he had serious doubts about Louie who was a local farmer, who had always kept to himself because he was embarrassed by his speech impediment. Poor Louie stuttered badly. But, NOT WANTING TO discourage Louie, the minister decided to let him try anyway.

He sent the three of them away with the back seat of their cars stacked with bibles. He asked them to meet with him and report the results of their door-to-door selling efforts the following Sunday.

Anxious to find out how successful they were, the minister immediately asked Jack, 'Well, Jack, how did you make out selling our bibles last week?'

Proudly handing the reverend an envelope, Jack replied, 'Using my sales prowess, I was able to sell 20 bibles, and here's the $200 I collected on behalf of the church.'

'Fine job, Jack!' The minister said, vigorously shaking his hand. 'You are indeed a fine salesman and the Church is indebted to you.'

Turning to Paul, 'And Paul, how many bibles did you sell for the church last week?'

Paul, smiling and sticking out his chest, confidently replied, 'I am a professional salesman. I sold 28 bibles on behalf of the church, and here's $280 I collected.'

The minister responded, 'That's absolutely splendid, Paul. You are truly a professional salesman and the church is indebted to you.'

Apprehensively, the minister turned to Louie and said, 'And Louie, did you manage to sell any bibles last week?' Louie silently offered the minister a large envelope.

The minister opened it and counted the contents. 'What is this?' the minister exclaimed. 'Louie, there's $3200 in here! Are you suggesting that you sold 320 bibles for the church, door to door, in just one week?'

Louie just nodded. That's impossible!' both Jack and Paul said in unison. 'We are professional salesmen, yet you claim to have sold 10 times as many bibles as we could.'

'Yes, this does seem unlikely,' the minister agreed. 'I think you'd better explain how you managed to accomplish this, Louie.'

Louie shrugged. 'I-I-I re-re-really do-do-don't kn-kn-know f-f-f-for sh-sh-sh-sure,' he stammered.

Impatiently, Paul interrupted. 'For crying out loud, Louie, just tell us what you said to them when they answered the door!'

'A-a-a-all I-I-I s-s-said wa-wa-was,' Louie replied, 'W-w-w-w-would y-y-y-you l-l-l-l-l-like t-t-to b-b-b-buy th-th-th-this b-b-b-b-bible F-f-for t-t-ten b-b-b-bucks ---o-o-o-or--- wo-wo-would yo-you j-j-j-just l-like m-m-me t-t-to st-st-stand h-h-here a-a-a-and r-r-r-r-r-read i-i-it t-to y-y-you??'

[DWM222]

Good one WhyYou