Jokes

Texasdrake · 08-17-2009, 11:33 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Immortal

Ok, I'm at it again. If any one here is from the Mideast, I'M SORRY!
This is just too funny. Enjoy!

http://www.flowgo.com/funny/13150_mi...ne-minute.html

I'm thinking you ment MIDDLEeast..mideast sounds like you were talking somewhere in the USA as in midwest..etc.

Immortal · 08-18-2009, 01:44 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Texasdrake

I'm thinking you ment MIDDLEeast..mideast sounds like you were talking somewhere in the USA as in midwest..etc.

Thats the name of the video, "The Mideast conflict in 1 minute".

TheDoctor · 08-18-2009, 03:45 PM

A cop is doing his night shift on a street known for the many "clandestine dates" happening there all the time. He then spots a couple in a car, with its inner lights bright on. He closes up on the car for a better view, and sees a young guy reading a computer magazine in the driver's seat and a girl polishing her nails in the rear seat. The cop, startled, comes to them, and asks the guy to open the window.

"Yes, officer?"
"Good evening, mister. What are you guys doing here?"
"Reading a magazine", the guy responds.
"OK", says the cop. Pointing at the girl, he continues, "And the young lady?"
The guy responds, "I think she is polishing her nails".

"Whoa", the cop thinks to himself. "A young couple alone in a car on the lovers' lane, and nothing lewd going on?!" But he keeps asking anyway:

"How old are you, young man?"
"22, sir", he answers.
"And your... How old is she?"
The guy looks at his wristwatch and responds for her:

"She'll be 18 in ten minutes."

mart · 08-21-2009, 05:45 PM

As mentioned in the "anything under the sun" thread". Here's some classic Monty Python sketches, starting with the alltime classic the parrot sketch. With a few other great sketches, British comedy at it's best.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=npjOSLCR2hE

Spam sketch
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=M_eYSuPKP3Y

Village idiot sketch
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jNBNqUdqm1E

And my favourite comedy "Faulty Towers" which for anyone not familiar with this British comedy. It was about a madcap hotel manager Basil Faulty played by John Cleese. With his ever suffering wife Sybil played by Prunella Scale. Not forgetting the in incompetent Spanish waiter Manuel played by Andrew Sach's. this is the classic car thrashing and still very funny today. There are many more clips but just in too many parts to link here.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mmQMYMcY6nI

captnjack · 08-21-2009, 10:39 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by mart

As mentioned in the "anything under the sun" thread". Here's some classic Monty Python sketches, starting with the alltime classic the parrot sketch. With a few other great sketches, British comedy at it's best.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=npjOSLCR2hE

Spam sketch
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=M_eYSuPKP3Y

Village idiot sketch
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jNBNqUdqm1E

And my favourite comedy "Faulty Towers" which for anyone not familiar with this British comedy. It was about a madcap hotel manager Basil Faulty played by John Cleese. With his ever suffering wife Sybil played by Prunella Scale. Not forgetting the in incompetent Spanish waiter Manuel played by Andrew Sach's. this is the classic car thrashing and still very funny today. There are many more clips but just in too many parts to link here.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mmQMYMcY6nI

I had forgotten the village idiot sketch and the car thrashing is a classic. I think there were lest than a dozen Fawlty Towers episodes made. And wasn't the maid John Cleese real life wife?

mart · 08-22-2009, 09:07 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by captnjack

I had forgotten the village idiot sketch and the car thrashing is a classic. I think there were lest than a dozen Fawlty Towers episodes made. And wasn't the maid John Cleese real life wife?

There was actually 12 episodes made of Faulty Towers and yes your right John Cleese was married to Connie Booth. Who played the maid Pollly Sherman, they married in 1968 and divorced in 1978.

One of my favourite episodes is "Waldorf salad". It's in three parts.

Part one
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9bYWVwrbk5U

Part two
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SSnul3ySiGk

Part three
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BGWmxddz4GM

grande351 · 08-22-2009, 02:37 PM

Thanks Mart! No one could do a "meltdown" like Basil Fawlty! I didn't know the bit about Cleese being married to Connie Booth at the time. I remember on the show when Basil was looking at Polly's sketchbook and answered the phone "Fawlty *******"! They never would have gotten away with that on US tv.
Andrew Sachs was great as Manuel too. According to IMDB, he was actually injured once while filming the show and sued the BBC!

captnjack · 08-23-2009, 12:51 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by mart

There was actually 12 episodes made of Faulty Towers and yes your right John Cleese was married to Connie Booth. Who played the maid Pollly Sherman, they married in 1968 and divorced in 1978.

One of my favourite episodes is "Waldorf salad". It's in three parts.

Part one
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9bYWVwrbk5U

Part two
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SSnul3ySiGk

Part three
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BGWmxddz4GM

Yeah that's a good episode! I never understood why the show only lasted for just one season.
There is a good one in which Basil is betting on the horses! Need to see if I can find it.

08-21-2009, 05:45 PM	#4
mart Danielle's Only True Love Join Date: Sep 2008 Location: Garden of England, Kent Posts: 2,189	As mentioned in the "anything under the sun" thread". Here's some classic Monty Python sketches, starting with the alltime classic the parrot sketch. With a few other great sketches, British comedy at it's best. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=npjOSLCR2hE Spam sketch http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=M_eYSuPKP3Y Village idiot sketch http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jNBNqUdqm1E And my favourite comedy "Faulty Towers" which for anyone not familiar with this British comedy. It was about a madcap hotel manager Basil Faulty played by John Cleese. With his ever suffering wife Sybil played by Prunella Scale. Not forgetting the in incompetent Spanish waiter Manuel played by Andrew Sach's. this is the classic car thrashing and still very funny today. There are many more clips but just in too many parts to link here. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mmQMYMcY6nI __________________ If You Don't Ask, You Don't Get Last edited by mart; 08-21-2009 at 05:48 PM.

08-18-2009, 03:45 PM	#3
TheDoctor Danielle's Imaginary Boyfriend Join Date: Apr 2009 Location: The TARDIS Posts: 503	A cop is doing his night shift on a street known for the many "clandestine dates" happening there all the time. He then spots a couple in a car, with its inner lights bright on. He closes up on the car for a better view, and sees a young guy reading a computer magazine in the driver's seat and a girl polishing her nails in the rear seat. The cop, startled, comes to them, and asks the guy to open the window. "Yes, officer?" "Good evening, mister. What are you guys doing here?" "Reading a magazine", the guy responds. "OK", says the cop. Pointing at the girl, he continues, "And the young lady?" The guy responds, "I think she is polishing her nails". "Whoa", the cop thinks to himself. "A young couple alone in a car on the lovers' lane, and nothing lewd going on?!" But he keeps asking anyway: "How old are you, young man?" "22, sir", he answers. "And your... How old is she?" The guy looks at his wristwatch and responds for her: "She'll be 18 in ten minutes."

08-22-2009, 02:37 PM	#7
grande351 Danielle's Imaginary Boyfriend Join Date: Oct 2008 Location: Baltimore, Maryland Posts: 876	Thanks Mart! No one could do a "meltdown" like Basil Fawlty! I didn't know the bit about Cleese being married to Connie Booth at the time. I remember on the show when Basil was looking at Polly's sketchbook and answered the phone "Fawlty *******"! They never would have gotten away with that on US tv. Andrew Sachs was great as Manuel too. According to IMDB, he was actually injured once while filming the show and sued the BBC!