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Old 01-04-2010, 09:19 PM   #99
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January 04, 2010
So I'm pretty sick right now (and have been since New Years eve day). I will write about my New Years experience tomorrow when I am hopefully feeling better.
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Old 01-07-2010, 11:14 PM   #100
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January 07, 2010
I just got finished reading and posting on the forum and read on the question thread a question about losing my virginity. I don't know if I told this to you guys before (or if I even should now since some people may find it kind of icky) but I actually didn't lose my virginity to a guy...I mean technically I didn't. When I was 13 I was severly anemic and had to go to the hospital because I was losing so much blood. The doctors had to put this medical device way up inside of me down there and that's what I lost my virginity on. I remember being so messed up from blood loss and from the medication they were pumping into me that I told my mom in front of a bunch of doctors and nurses that I "hoped that wasn't what sex felt like" lol. I remember her blushing so bad from that. So anyways, yep...my first time was with a medical device. At least I got the pain done with then and didn't have to deal with it on my 15th birthday when I had real sex.

Thursday morning I woke up with a sore throat. I have a theory that whenever I get super excited about something I start getting sick (it happened for New Years and it's happened during many other holidays and fun events.) All my friends had arrived at the hotel before me (I ended up having to change my flight to an earlier time so that way I would have enough time to hang out, eat dinner, and get ready.) I definitely think that my group was the biggest in the whole hotel. My group are total rockstars! I ended up getting to sleep before anyone else and that was at like 4 in the morning. One of our friends who is also a local dj here in Phoenix was spinning at the Resolutions party (the party on New Years day) so a couple of my friends ended up staying up until 9:30 in the morning to see him. There was no hot water New Years day so everyone got like 50% of their rooms, which was really sweet since I had booked two rooms.

I didn't end up going to the Resolutions party since I was super sick (coughing, sneezing, running nose, etc.) That weekend was also pretty uneventful since I didn't feel like doing anything other than laying around watching tv. I watched more tv that weekend than I've done in a very long time. I ended up seeing that movie Paranormal Activity (not a good movie to see when you live alone.) This week has been pretty busy for me. Yesterday Dallas and I went to Chandler Fashion Square (one of my fave malls since they have a Windsor Store there) to get our AVN dresses. I ended up getting my dress at Windsor and it was the first dress I tried on. It's super sexy. It's all black, fitted down to my knees and then flares out mermaid style. The straps are rhinestones, so I got these sexy dangly rhinestone earrings and a rhinestone bracelet to match. After the mall we went and got our nails done. I left my jacket there and need to remember to pick it up. Will probably do that tomorrow, but then that also would require me to drive all the way over there.

I also got airbrushed tanned last night, so sleeping last night was not the most comfortable thing in the world. The liquid they spray on you is kind of weird smelling (not bad, just different.) The one thing I hate about it is how sticky it makes you feel. I have a bad enough time with humidity (which thank gawd I don't have to deal with in Arizona.) I ran out of books yesterday so had to run to a bookstore to grab more books to read. I hate being out after I've gotten the tan done. It's super dark before you wash off the bronzer so I'm sure I looked pretty funny. I noticed nobody would really look me in the eye (or maybe that was just me being too embarassed to look anybody in the eyes.) Dallas wanted me to go out last night with the group but I decided to stay in since I wasn't feeling well and didn't want to get even worse (which unfortunately seems to be happening.)

Today I got my eyelash extensions put on. The lady that does the eyelash extensions made a video showing people how to take care of the eyelashes....guess who's the eyelash model...me! I want to post the video but the last thing I want is to cause trouble for the eyelash lady because she has an adult model on her website. I was supposed to get my hair done today (which I need really, really bad right now) but unfortunately my guy had to cancel on me. Fortunately I can get it done before school starts but unfortunately I can't get it done before my shoot next Tuesday. I just bought my Valentines day costume and they shoot "item(s)" that I will be using. It's definitely going to be a very...fetishy shoot, I'm sure not all of you are going to like it, but whatever, it's going to be fun for me. I will be putting up my hardcore video on the site in the next couple of days. Get ready for it everyone. Actually I probably will need to do another hardcore video this next shoot day.

Did I tell you guys that I signed up for school? I'm taking math, English (freaking lame...I thought I tested out of English but apparently you can't test out of English), fencing (hopefully they don't cancel this class again), and philosophy of sexuality. I wanted to take this other sex class but I would've had to wake up super early (like at 9 or something crazy like that) and I've vowed to never take classes were I have to wake up before 10 AM. I just wish they offered classes I am interested in at night instead of in the morning.

So this weekend is the AVN awards. I'm so excited....I just wish I wasn't sick. I'm hoping that I can get better tonight and tomorrow. There are a few girls there that I am hoping to meet up with (April O'Neil is one.) Who knows...maybe I'll see some of you guys who are planning on going, there also.
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Old 01-13-2010, 06:31 AM   #101
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Jan. 12, 2010
So I just got done with a hardcore hour of cardio. I'm really psyching myself up to start eating healthier and get in better shape. I have calculatted that by April 27th I should be in perfect shape. I went pretty crazy last week shopping for food. I bought a bunch of fish, fruits, veggies, yogurt, and chicken. The only problem is...well I don't really cook. All the meat I've bought is sitting in the freezer (heck, some of the stuff I've bought has been sitting in there for like four months now). I bought a bunch of ziplock containers so I can cook a bunch of stuff at once and just store it in the fridge. Lately I've just been snacking on yogurt, fruits and veggies since I'm too lazy to cook. I actually need to get more yogurt since I've almost eaten all of it.

So the AVN Awards were a ton of fun. I was still sick going there but for whatever reason as soon as I got a drink in me at the airport I started feeling a lot better. When we got to the Vegas airport Dallas and I ended up doing an oxygen bar "treatment". I'm not sure if it actually helped, but the massage they gave me was AWESOME. The first night was a ton of fun. Dallas and I went to Sapphires Gentlemen's club and spent a bunch of money (as usual). Then went to the Venetian to meet up with some friends and from there we went to this bar/club (I think it was Lavo). What's really funny is that for the first time I had somebody recognize me in public and actually come up and introduce themselves. What's even funnier is that it was Sara Peachez (another website girl)! We ended up hanging out with her group and decided to go to Drai's. When we got down to the taxi line to go to Drai's I remembered that I needed to get cash so Dallas and I had to go back upstairs to the ATM. Well when we came back everyone was gone. We thought that they had already left for Drai's so we went ahead and took a cab over there. About 30 minutes later the group showed up. Apparently they thought that we were going to the restroom and decided that they needed to go to the restroom to and then ended up searching for us in the Venetian for heading to Drai's. So that night I barely got an of sleep (about 3 hours).

We didn't do much the next day since we had a hair appointment at 6. Dallas and I were kind of irritated after finding out how much our hair cost us ($102!) I liked my hair...but not really. Honestly I wish I had gotten a hairdo that was down or at least half up and half down instead of all up. I was super worried about the dress I was planning on wearing because I thought it was going to be too formal. I ended up trying on my purple dress (you guys have seen me in it before) but Dallas talked me into wearing the dress I had bought for the awards. Neither of us could figure out if we were supposed to walk the red carpet or not but fortunately Dallas got ahold of our friend Kevin from Hexed Media and he told us to walk it. We walked around quiet a bit trying to find were it was supposed to be and finally found it hidden in this weird exit location. Walking the red carpet was....nerve wrecking to say the least. I was so freaking nervous that pretty much the whole time I held Dallas hand and rushed us from one spot to another without really taking my time for pictures. Next time I do anything like this is I am going to A) wear my hair down B) probably get a drink of alcohol in me to calm down C) practice posing better and D) get talent seats. FTVChris ended up getting Dallas and I seats in the fan section and not the talent section so unfortunately I wasn't able to really hang out or talk to any porn stars.

I hate to say this but one of the things that irritated me the most was that people were taking more pictures of Dallas than they were of me. I mean come on...I'm the porn star here. If I was in her place I would have been shoving me foward and would've been telling people to take pictures of me and not her. But you know what...I figured it out...it's because she's skinny. People are drawn to skinny girls and putting me next to her, well I'm a giant next to her. Big boobs rock, but tiny girls always win unfortunately. As much as people say that they like the way I look and they prefer women like me, most people prefer skinnier girls (especially in this business.) If I plan on going anywhere in this business then I need to get in rockin' shape. That's one of the reasons why I'm working out and trying to get in shape more.

The awards ceremony was a ton of fun to watch. Belladonna did this really hot dance with her dance troupe. Baby Bash also did a routine and there were these really cool (and hot) circus performers doing acrobatics all over the stage. We actually met Baby Bash's band when we were walking from the Palm's Place towers to the casino. I was laughing because at the beginning of the show the announcer was telling the crowd to do different things ("now everyone clap", "now everyone laugh" etc.) At first I couldn't figure out why the hell they were doing that then I realized that the AVN's are supposed to air on HBO or some channel like that and apparently that's how they do the "reaction shots". I wonder if that's how it is at the Grammy's, Oscars, etc.

Watching the awards definitely made me want to get...deeper (that's the only word I can think of right now) in this business. I want to win a bunch of awards and have people yell and cheer for me when my name is called out. Sasha Grey got the Jenna Jameson Crossover Star of the Year award. I absolutely want to win that award. I remember seeing Jenna Jameson and several other pornstars on different advertisements (and for things that aren't even adult related). That's what I want to do! It just sucks because I feel like I don't really have any way of accomplishing these things. First off I have no idea were to begin. I don't know who to contact and what to do. It sucks having all these dreams but having no idea how to make them a reality.

After the awards we went to a friends bungalow party before heading to the nightclub Rain where Paul Oakenfold was doing his Perfecto tour. It was actually pretty sweet hearing him live after hearing him on XM radio all this time. We ended up going to Moon because I thought April O'Neil was going to be there (I was hoping to meet up with her sometime during that weekend but that didn't happen.) We all went to Drai's (I think this was around 4ish or so) but went back to the hotel because the line was super long to get in. Dallas ended up going back to the room to crash out but I was doing it rockstar style and partied until about 6ish with my friends before finally deciding I was far to delirious to be up any longer.

So my sister is in town this week for my nephews first birthday. My mom wants the girls to go out to get manis/pedis and to do dinner and a movie. Fortunately you don't really have to talk during manis/pedis and movies but dinner is going to be a hassle. My sister and I can only seem to get along for about an hour before we are at each others throats. Maybe if I ply her with alcohol she will be nicer to me (though my mom would not appreciate that one bit.) School starts next week. I'm excited...but not. It's going to suck having to get back into the swing of things and not have days were I can just lounge around and do absolutely nothing (though I will have Friday, Saturdays, and Sundays to do that.) I'm going to be pretty busy March and April. The Phoenix Forum is April 8th - 10th (right during school). And in March I'm going to the Miami Winter Music Conference the 25th to the 29th and at some point will be doing a shoot in Hawaii with FTVRob. My next shoot is on Wednesday the 20th. I will be doing my Valentine's day shoot, probably another hardcore shoot, and I'm not sure what else.
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Old 01-26-2010, 07:41 PM   #102
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Jan. 26, 2010
Okay what a bad time for the website to start screwing up on me. For whatever reason I can't seem to upload HTML pages onto the website...and unfortunately Rob is in Hawaii for a dental conference and won't be back until Friday or Saturday.

BTW I am totally dropping my philosophy of sexuality class. I am just not into philosophy at all. The whole time it just felt like we were talking ourselves around in circles. I guess I'm a very black and white person. I like things to be...definite. Other than that class, all my other classes have been going really well. I love my English class. The teacher is awesome and the past two classes I've had a blast in. My math class is...interesting. The teacher is this really cool hippy like man that loves Google.

My fencing class is going to be fun, but it's also going to be pretty difficult too. I only have that class once a week but it's for like two hours. Yesterday during the fencing class we were learning advances, retreats, and lunges. For whatever reason I was having a difficult time doing the lunges. First off I kept my arms pretty straight ahead of me to begin with so he would say "extend" and my arm would already be extended. Then he would say "lunge" and I would lunge but my front foot wouldn't step foward some of the time. Another one of my problems is that I naturally seem to drag my feet during the movements so it would kind of mess me up on my retreats. We are using the foil (one of the three swords you use in fencing). The teacher showed us all the swords and told us about each of them. Personally I think I would be better at the sabre which they use with cutting/slashing type motions.

This weekend I am going to Big Bear to go snowboarding. I think I will probably take a lesson the first day (since I'm only been snowboarding once when I was like 15 years old.) As usual I started feeling sick last night (I really do get sick everytime something exciting happens to me.) It's only a sore throat though so I think I can kick it before Big Bear.
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Old 02-08-2010, 10:44 PM   #103
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February 08, 2010
Dallas threw a Superbowl party at her house yesterday. We figured we would have about 30 people there but I think only 15-20 people showed up (which was a good thing since there really isn't all that much room at her place.) We made jello shots (which I ended up doing way too many of) and jungle juice (which was really nasty!). All the girls were routing for the Saints (I picked them because they are from my home state). Personally I don't really like football and really don't like watching the games, but it's always fun hanging out with the group.

I didn't get much sleep Saturday night so Sunday was kind of...spacey for me. I ended up going out to eat at Postinos (I love their food and they have awesome bruschetta). From there we went to Sanctum which is this weird gothic club in a weird part of Phoenix. I was actually pretty entertained while there. They were playing industrial music and a lot of 80's Depeche Mode type music. It wasn't bad, but it wasn't what we all were looking for. We ended up leaving and went to Bar Smith. The music was even worse there. Apparently they were playing what my friend likes to call "old school house" like something you hear clubs in San Fransisco playing. I just thought it was crappy music. From there we went to this German restaurant, The Black Mills, which turns into a nightclub on Fridays and Saturdays. It's actually pretty freaking random! The music there was good most of the time. The first DJ sucked big time. From TBM we went to Cin Cin in oldtown Scottsdale where we stayed for about 20 minutes before going to an after-afterparty at the Optima (these really sweet and expensive condos in Scottsdale). I didn't get to sleep until about 7 in the morning. I was actually pretty surprised because Dallas wanted me over at her place at 11 AM (I didn't get up until 1). I was totally expecting her to be p!ssed off at me for not being on time (but the game wasn't even until 4:30 anyways...so it really didn't matter.)

Friday night a few of us went to Revolver (this new club that opened in oldtown Scottsdale.) I liked the club itself, but the music was pretty iffy. From there we went to American Junkie where I met up with Aaron, Lia and her group. We took off at about 1 and went to ***** Cat Lounge where my friend works as a promoter (though I didn't see him that night.) I actually got home at a pretty decent time that night...though I didn't get to sleep until about 4ish.

Snowboarding the weekend before last was awesome. Thursday night we went to this club in Hollywood. I wasn't really sure about going to a club especially since we were supposed to be on our way by like 7 or some crazy early time like that. Of course we didn't actually take off at that time since we didn't get back home until 4 or 5 in the morning. I ended up drinking way too much that night. At one point I was trying to show one of my friends a picture of Dallas' new boobs on my cell phone when I realized that I didn't have my cell phone anymore. We spent like an hour searching for my phone before realizing that it was gone. I was so upset....my phone is pretty much my lifeline to the world (along with my car and computer). But of course like an idiot I found it later on in my jacket pocket.

On the drive up to Big Bear I only had a panic attack once (good for me!) We ended up snowboarding all three days we stayed up there. The first day (Friday) we actually did night snowboarding which I was kind of worried about. It was my second time ever snowboarding so I was worried about doing it in the dark. I actually did a pretty good job (at least that's what my friends told me.) I only had three drinks that whole weekend (while the rest of my friends proceeded to get hammered). I realized that alcohol, snowboarding, and I don't mix very well. Saturday I had two bloody Mary's and was feeling pretty cocky and decided to go down one of the more advanced runs (I blame this all on my friend Megan though since she's the one who told me about it in the first place.) Never again will I do that. I ended up landing on my tailbone so many times that I thought a broke it. I also landed on my arm and wrist quite a few times. I was very angry by the time I got to the bottom that I pretty much quit for the day.

The next day I did pretty much the same thing (went up a more advanced trail). That was a huge mistake. I spent most of the time on my butt since my legs were in such tremendous pain (BTW three days back to back of snowboarding when you are only going for your second time....in five years, is not a good idea.) All in all I did have a great time. The trip back down the mountain took like more than two hours vs. the 25-30 minutes it normally takes. I plan on buying my own snowboard. I want to get a custom one that says "Danielle" on the bottom with "Love as Thou Wilt" underneath. On the top I want to have a picture of me between the bindings with fairy wings photoshopped on (my friends find this hillarious). I want the whole board to be purple, black, and silver.

This weekend I am throwing a Valentine's party at my friend Ryan's house. I've already spent over $250 (just on decorations and candy) for this party so it had better be a blast. I was kind of irritated at my friends because Ryan and I decided to throw the party on Friday the 12th (I had a shoot on Sunday the 14th which I then had to move to Friday the 12th). But apparently Ryan was drunk and didn't even remember us talking about throwing a party in the first place. So he was pretty surprised when I sent him a Facebook event invite to a Valentine's party at his place on a night when he already had something planned. So we ended up moving the party to Saturday the 13th, but then of course I get b!tched at because that day didn't work for certain people (I'm not going to be planning any more events because this always seems to happen.) It sucks because there are quite a few people who aren't going to be in town that day/weekend, so it will probably end up being a smaller party. I'm pretty excited because one of the local DJ's will be playing at the party after he gets done mixing at whatever club he's working that night. I just hope that the cops don't get called for a noise complaint. We didn't get in trouble last time for the Christmas party but you never know.
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Old 02-10-2010, 06:21 AM   #104
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Feb. 10, 2010
Just got done making a few changes to the site. I put the links to all my social networking sites on the "About Me" page. I also added a new pic and some more info on the page. On the main page (the second page after the 18+ warning page) I changed the pictures on top and I changed the pictures on the "My Photo" part of the page. Need to process my Valentine's video into the 1,000kb/s version for tomorrow then I can go to sleep.
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Old 02-23-2010, 09:55 PM   #105
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Feb. 24, 2010
I'm a little irritated right now. Not only do I have to deal with people complaining but there seems to be a lot of drama with my group right now. I feel like I'm in high school again. I hang out with people older than me yet I feel like I'm the oldest in the group. Whatever! I need to clean my house, go to the library, and get food. Will write more later if I'm in a better mood.
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Old 03-08-2010, 05:54 PM   #106
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Mar. 08, 2010
Things seem to be going a lot better for me. I have a ton of trips planned for the next few months. This weekend I will be going to San Francisco with some friends (I'm hoping to meet some of my fans also...though sorry about giving you guys such short notice.) I'm very excited because on Friday I will be getting a 1 hour and 45 minute massage. I've never had a massage that's lasted that long. My friend was telling me about this museum that has a happy hour bar on Thursdays which I definitely hope we will attend (another thing I've never done...drink in a museum.) On Saturday I will be going to Napa with the group and we will be doing a wine tasting. The last time I did winetasting was in Germany on the Rhein river and it also included a Rhein River boat tour. BTW boats, the sun, and alcohol do not mix well with me. I ended up getting a mix of alcohol poisoning and sun sickness and ended up sick and bedridden for at least 24 hours. Unfortunately I get motion sickness (though it hits me at random times) and the drive from Napa to San Francisco is like an hour long so hopefully I don't end up getting sick this time.

In two weeks I will be going to Miami for the Winter Music Conference....pretty much just an excuse to party 24/7 for 4 days straight. If any of you are going here is the party itenerary:
Thursday night - Karu and Y
Friday day - Surfcomber
Friday night - Nocturnal
Saturday day - don't have any plans...hopefully I will be able to meet some members during this time
Saturday night - Karu and Y
Sunday day - Surfcomber
Sunday night - Bed

Next month I will be attending the Coachella festival. I finally booked a house... I was freaking out for a while there because all the houses were rented out, but thankfully there was a cancellation. The house is going to be packed. We have 10 people going and what kind of sucks is that there are only 2 bathrooms. I'm probably going to have someone rent a van so that we can all drive together from the house to the festival and back rather than take 2 or 3 cars. Also another minus is that we can only have 3 cars parked at the house and I don't think everyone will be driving up from Phoenix at the same time (so we can't all carpool.) I will most likely end up driving there with 4 or 5 people. I'm hoping that I can actually have fun this time (I ended up putting down the security deposit on the Big Bear Oktoberfest cabin and ended up freaking out half the time because I was worried about stuff breaking or people making a mess...definitely did not have all that great of a time.)

I'm already planning out my birthday celebration since I have to give everyone a heads up so they can put in their request for time off. This year there will be a lot more people attending it. I plan on having the celebration in Vegas again. I'm thinking about staying at the HardRock hotel since it seems to be well priced and it's also where the Rehab Sunday pool party is located. Thankfully by staying at the hotel you get tickets into Rehab (which is awesome since tickets can cost $50 for women and up to $150 for men.) I will probably want to see a show there...maybe the Anthony Cools show like Dallas and I did last time we were in Vegas (though we are definitely going to be on time this time and I definitely want to volunteer myself to be hypnotized.) I am also getting a party bus like I did last year and will be getting a stretch limo to pick us up and drop us off at the airport (it's actually a great price and we get champagne and roses for the ladies.) I was thinking about getting a table at XS but with up to 15 people going the price was going to be at least $3,000 which I am not okay paying. I might also get a table at Drai's afterhours club for Friday and Saturday night since the lines can get very long to get in...but A)I don't want to spend a ton of money (still need to figure out a price for that) and B)my friends and I will probably be completely drunk by then and will not need more bottles of alcohol.

So the Valentine's night party was fun. The house looked awesome with all the decorations I got. Jesica got these naughty balloons that said things like "blow me" and "f@ck me". Dallas and Rob F (not boss Rob) didn't attend the party which sucked (but they had a romantic weekend in Temecula winetasting.) The only thing that kind of sucked was that there was quite a bit a drama. Mike and Megan ended up breaking up like twice. Jesica wasn't in the best of moods (I think she wasn't feeling very peachy though.) Keley ended up flirting with one of my friends dates (though to be fair he was also flirting hardcore and was making some very inappropriate suggestions and comments to her.) Also Lindsay was accusing Keley of trying to make out with Andrew who Lindsay was with that night (I think we found out that this wasn't true.) Overall I think we had over 30 people at the party. One of the local DJ's, Michael James also played at the party which was really awesome. I told Ryan (the person who's house we were throwing the party at) to tell the neighbors that we were throwing a party but apparently he didn't listen to me. We ended up getting 3 noise complaints before the cops got called at like 6 in the morning. I ended up leaving pretty soon after that.

BTW I got this hair streaking stuff in hot pink for the Valentine's party that was supposed to be temporary but my hairdresser showed me this one splotch in my hair that is still bright pink. Thankfully it isn't a spot that you can really see and right now it's actually covered by dark blue hair (which was actually supposed to be purple...not the first time my hairdresser has messed up on the color.) And before you guys all freak out, my whole head is not blue...the only party that is blue is a little bit of the hair underneath (kind of like FTVGirls Christine 2007.) I'm sure FTVRob is going to completely freak out when he sees it but I'm only planning on keeping my hair this blue color for like a month or two before bleaching it back to blonde. Actually the blonde color I have right now is almost my natural hair color. It's going to take a few times though before all the blue is out. It will go from dark blue to a medium shade of blue then to a light sky blue and then hopefully back to the blonde color. Sometimes I'm just super spontaneous (I totally wasn't planning on dying my hair a crazy color...I ended up deciding that when I got to the salon.) At least it's something temporary rather than sometime permanent like a tattoo.

The weekend before last weekend I attended the Renassaince Faire and the Phoenix Open. This was the third year that I went to the Pleasure Feast at the Renn Faire. I invited a bunch of people with me but everyone ended up flaking except for one of my friends (I was not too happy about that.) I wasn't too excited about going to the Phoenix Open but it actually ended up being a lot of fun. I thought the 16th hole was hillarious. BTW if you've never attended the Phoenix Open or watched it on tv, apparently it's supposed to be the rowdiest golf tournament out there. It's pretty much just an excuse to dress up in the craziest golf outfits (picture bright neon plaid outfits) and drink a ton of beer. I didn't drink too much though I had an allergic reaction to some weeds or pollen or something and ended up breaking out in hives. My friend gave me some Benadryl and I didn't realize until after I took it that you really aren't supposed to mix Benadryl and alcohol (though the effects of it were pretty funny.) So the 16th hole has stadium type seating around it. It's a pretty short hole so the golfers don't spend too much time there (which they probably don't want to do anyways since the crowd there is so loud.) If the golfers don't hit the ball on the green they get booed. At one point we all started doing the wave. It would go all the way around until the corporate seating area then it would stop (they go booed big time for that....it got to the point were we would boo them before the wave even got to their section.) We did this for like ten minutes...it was awesome! We ended up at this tent (the Tilted Kilt tent), watching the Canada vs. US Olympics hockey game....which I found a lot more interesting.

I also went to a hockey game last Thursday. That was my second or third hockey game I've attended. It was the Coyotes vs. Avalanche. I've got to say it was probably the most exciting game I've ever attended. They were tied up until the very end of the game with less than 30 seconds left before they scored a goal. I'm not all that into sports but when something like that happens it draws you into the game.

School is going well. Spring Break is coming up here really soon. Dallas wanted to do a girls trip to Mexico but since I have two trips already planned for this month I didn't really want to squeeze in another.
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Old 03-16-2010, 07:14 AM   #107
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Mar. 15, 2010
Today I shot two sets for my site. I did my Easter set (I think it turned out beautifully). It was shot in the pink room for those of y'all that are pink room fans. The other set was a public nudity set that I am quite proud of (I really do seem to be getting over my public nudity...shyness.) I was hoping to get one other set done but FTVRob had a lot of editing to do and has been shooting a lot lately so I didn't want to stress him out too much having to shoot me. Fortunately since I live close to him it isn't too hard to schedule shoots. He wanted to shoot me in the airplane hangar that he shot Lia 19 in (The Jetset Lifestyle and The Largest Photo Studio sets) but that was on Thursday when I had already left for San Francisco. It's a bummer too since I really loved that set of her and wanted to shoot there. It isn't often that we get a chance to shoot in locations like that so we definitely have to take advantage of it when we can.

San Francisco was fantastic. The flight there was "delayed" so my friends and I went to get something to eat. Thank gawd I checked the time when I did and got us out of there because the flight ended up actually being on time and everyone had boarded the plane. Unfortunately I wasn't able to sit with my friends since we boarded so late. I don't really like flying (though I'm not as scared of it as I used to be.) I wasn't feeling too good (actually I felt really bad...super nauseous) since I had drank the night before (and I didn't even have that much...only three glasses of champagne and some random shot Dallas got for us.) Being a lightweight sucks sometimes.

Thursday was pretty chill....we didn't do much that day and later ended up going out to eat at this Mexican restaurant (I love sangrias!). The "Nightlife" event at the California Academy of Sciences was a ton of fun. Unfortunately we didn't get there until pretty late and ended up only having an hour and a half to explore the museum. They had this live exhibit where you could watch a taxidermist stuffing an animal. A ground squirrel, mouse, and bird was being stuffed. I thought the mice were pretty funny because the museum had put little accessories on them like an neck ruff. It was also interesting to see because not only did you see the skin being stuffed but the rest of the animal's bodies where there too. It's not as bloody as I thought it would be. They had this interactive exhibit showing you how much carbon output you have. Unfortunately mine is very high with all the traveling I do.

On Friday I had my hour and forty-five minute long massage. It was absolutely fabulous. But instead of saying that I have no preference for a masseuse I should probably say that I prefer a woman (though I've noticed that when I get an attractive female masseuse then I end up thinking about happy endings and not the massage itself.) Trying to get back to my hotel was a pain. You would expect the guy at the front of Hilton hotel (not sure what they are called....they're the ones who open your door as you drive up and they also normally whistle the taxis over) to be more helpful and find a taxi for you, but nooo. I pretty much had to fend for myself. Since I live in Arizona and am not sure on how to hail taxis in a big city I just stood on the sidewalk like an idiot for like ten minutes just waving at all the cars. Finally this nice Chinese cabdriver took pity on me and dangerously cut off several cars to pick me up and whisk me off to my hotel. That night my friends and I went out to eat at this one wine bar/restaurant called First Crush. They had a fabulous wine menu (though I had the champagne flight) but the food way...eh. After that we went to this old timey bar called Rick House. They had the best drink ever called a Pleasant Evening. It tasted like Fresca and you really couldn't taste the alcohol in it (the best drinks are the ones were you can't taste alcohol...I hate the taste of alcohol.) We ended the night at Ruby Skye where Sasha was playing. There is a huge difference between the Phoenix nightlife and SF nightlife. In Phoenix people get super dressed up. In SF I saw a lot of girls dressed very casually and no makeup (that would not fly in AZ.) I think that the music was even different from what they would play in AZ. The club was okay....a lot older than the clubs in Scottsdale and honestly it was kind of stinky (had a weird smelly gym smell to it.)

Saturday we went to this awesome little tea house called Crown and Crumpet (I absolutely love tea houses....English afternoon tea is the best and I would do it everyday if I lived near a tea house.) From there we went to Fisherman's Wharf and Pier 39 where I did a ton of shopping. We had lunch at some pizza joint about 10 minutes away (we met some of my friend's friends there) and then went back to Pier 39. I was pretty exhausted at the end of the day and ended up crashing out really early until Sunday morning.

On Sunday we went to Chinatown and had dim sum. I love the concept of dim sum (food trolleys being carted around and being able to pick and choose what you would like to eat), but I wasn't too fond of the food. I also did a lot of shopping there. I bought a whole Chinese costume to wear for a shoot. I bought a cheongsam in black with butterflies all over it and black floral shoes to go with it. I'm not going to tell you guys what I bought to use for the shoot...but you guys will like it for sure. The only problem with the dress is that one of the buttons won't stay closed, but it's around the bust area so it's understandable. I'll definitely have to take it to a seamstress to have that fixed before I shoot in it. I also bought this adorable little Chinese outfit and this hilarious dragon hat for my little nephew. I hope to gawd the outfit fits since I really am not sure what size he wears (I got him a size 1).

I absolutely love traveling, but it's tiring for sure. Dallas wanted us to go to Vegas or Mexico for Spring Break (which is this week) but honestly two trips a month is more than enough for me. Besides I will be in Vegas next month and the month after. Tomorrow I am going to see "Alice in Wonderland" in 3D. This will be my second 3D movie ever....the last one I went to see was when I was like 11 or 12. I found out that the apartment above me is a corporate apartment. If you don't know what a corporate apartment is, it's pretty much an alternative to a long-term hotel stay. Unfortunately for me that means that I can potentially have a new neighbor every month. I've already had a stomper and a devil child (a child that makes an incredible amount of noise at all hours of the day/night with parents that don't seem to know what a nuisance their child is to the rest of society.) I think there is a possibility I may have another devil child neighbor....I pray that it's not so.
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Old 04-29-2010, 08:36 AM   #108
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Apr. 18, 2010
Okay so last time I wrote a journal entry was before Miami Winter Music Conference, The Phoenix Forum and Coachella. So I'll start off telling you guys about WMC.

I've never been to Miami before, so it was great visiting a new city. The service there is absolutely horrible (especially for the prices you pay). I stayed at the National hotel (there was 3 people staying with me in this tiny room.) The first day (Thursday) we got to the hotel around 4ish and walked around the streets, shopping and stuff. We stopped by this cute restaurant for food and sangrias (I love sangria). We saw Biz Markie (I think that's how you spell his name). I had no idea who he was until my friends pointed him out to me and sang the songs that he sang. Dallas and I both got pictures with him. That night we went to Karu and Y to see Above and Beyond (and a ton of other DJ's). I can't believe how huge that club was...by far one of the biggest clubs I've ever been in. We didn't get back to the hotel until pretty late (this seemed to happen quite a bit during the trip.) The next day we went to the Surfcomber pool party. It was pouring rain outside which was a bummer at first but then became very amusing for me (watching girls in 5 inch heels running around trying not to get wet is hilarious!) We met this super nice couple from Ohio there and ended up hanging out with them the whole pool party. Later on the group went to Nocturnal (this was my friends birthday so I wanted to make it a lot of fun for him.) I didn't stay too long there because I was feeling super sleep deprived (I only got a couple hours of sleep Wednesday night because I was so excited...so I was really running low by then.) Saturday day we stayed at the hotel for their pool party which was a ton of fun....totally chill. Dallas and I walked around the beach for a bit and took some pictures (we both decided it would be terrible to be in Miami and not visit the beach/ocean once.) Saturday night was Karu and Y again. That night I didn't get back to the hotel until like 5 in the morning. Finding a taxi to take us back to the hotel was a pain in the butt. We found a taxi that was trying to get $50 for taking us to the hotel. I was okay with that but my friends got mad at the taxi driver for trying to rip us off. I ended up getting pretty sick that night (sleep deprivation plus being in the sun all day, drinking will do that to me.) Sunday I ended up staying in the hotel all day. I was supposed to go to the Surfcomber pool party again but ended up giving my extra tickets to my friends. Sunday night we were supposed to go to Bed where some of the local DJ's from Phoenix were going to be spinning. I'm sad that I missed it but I definitely did not feel up to it at all. We left on Monday....honestly I was pretty happy to be getting home. I think two days of partying is my max for sure.

The Phoenix Forum was at the beginning of this month. I was super excited about it (I had a ton of fun last year there.) The first day was awesome. Dallas was able to get a ticket through one of the guys that visits the club she dances at (it normally costs around $275 for a ticket and you have to be in the industry to get one.) I ended up doing a shoot there. The shoot turned out really well in my opinion. I did get an airbrush tan the day before so I do look super tan (and maybe a little orange in some of the pics). It was a super public shoot, possibly the most public shoot I've done so far. I was pretty nervous about doing public nudity around everyone but it was pretty chill and nobody really bothered us. I was supposed to shoot a second time but FTVRob didn't want to be at the forum any longer so we ended up stopping at one shoot. Dallas and I ended up hanging out at the pool with some of our friends who are in the industry for a couple hours before getting something to eat and leaving to get ready for the night. I had to drop Dallas off at her place since I picked her up and she decided not to go out again (I guess she wanted to see her boyfriend). I ended up going back for about 30 minutes but left because I started getting sick (you see a pattern here....I get in the sun and I get sick.) I felt terrible the next day too so I didn't end up going the rest of the time which I kind of regret but at there is always next year. I didn't do the topless dodge ball tournament because I didn't feel like I was in good enough shape for it this time.


Coachella in Indio, California was amazing. I have never been to a real concert before (I don't really count seeing DJ's perform as a concert) so seeing bands play live was an awesome experience for me. We saw David Guetta, Deadmau5, Muse, Kaskade, Dirty South, Bass Nectar, Tiesto and a couple other bands there (mostly DJ's though...hehe.) The house that we stayed in was gorgeous. It was about 25 minutes away from the concert but that was perfectly fine with me since I was worried that we weren't going to be able to get a place to stay in the first place. I started looking for rental homes pretty late and apparently everything sells out really quick. The tickets for Coachella sold out and so one of my friends wasn't able to go and the other one had to sneak in the first day. This was by far the most chill music trip I've ever taken. I had maybe one drink the whole weekend and ended up getting plenty of sleep. The festival music started at like 11 AM and lasted until 1 AM but there was no way that I was going to the festival before 4 PM. The first day we ended up getting there at about 7 (Dallas made us take the wrong exit and we got stuck in traffic for like an hour at least.) The second day we got there around 5ish, which was pretty tiring. My one friend Erik ended up taking off, doing his own thing. Apparently he snuck into the VIP area and saw Beyonce, Jay Z, Pink and a couple other celebrities. Dallas and I both got pictures with the famous burlesque dancer Dita Von Tease. I thought I had booked the house only until Sunday but when I went through my emails I realized that I actually had it until Monday (the "check out" time was ridiculously early too....like 10 AM!) Dallas and her boyfriend ended up leaving on Sunday since he had to work on Monday. I didn't end up going to the festival on Sunday which I should have. Apparently my two guy friends ended up sneaking into the VIP area again and met a ton of celebrities. They met Jay Z and Beyonce, one of the guys from Hot Tub Time Machine, the guy from Crank, Paris Hilton, Tommy Lee, and a bunch of other celebs. I was totally jealous when they got back to the house and told me about it!


I just recently got a new puppy. Her name is Love Bug. She's about 16 weeks old and a Papillon (I had a Papillon before...they are the best small dog breed ever!) I named her Love Bug because she is a super cuddler. She follows me around everywhere and sleeps about as much as I do. I was thinking about doing a residential boarding training program for her but when I really started thinking about it I realized that I want to be part of her training (plus some of the programs last like 3 months.) She's been doing amazing so far....potty training has been relatively easy. The only problem we have is that she hates her crate and when I take a bath or shower. She absolutely flips out when I take a bath/shower even though she can see me the whole time. It's been a pain since I love taking long baths and take like 3 a day sometimes. The chinchillas and her get a long very well. Actually they don't really pay attention to each other which is probably a good thing. The chinchillas cage is off the ground so Love Bug probably can't even really see them.



School is going to end really soon here. We have about two weeks left which I'm really excited about. This summer is going to be full of trips (as usual). For my 22nd birthday we will be going to Vegas again. We are all staying at the Hard Rock so that we can get passes to Rehab on Sunday. Saturday night we are going to have a party bus for 4 hours and then we will end the night at Rain in the Palms where Paul Oakenfold plays. Like last year I will have a stretch limo pick us up and drop us off at the airport. I would like to go to the Anthony Cools show again because I really want to be hypnotized but I'm not sure how we will be feeling on Sunday night after all the partying we will be doing during the day. This weekend my friend is throwing his first pool party. This will be the start to the summer. I want to try making sangria for the party...that will be my first time making an alcoholic drink (well actually it's my second time...but I don't want to even remember my first time...jello shots that were the consistency of gel candles.)
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Old 05-14-2010, 07:36 AM   #109
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May 14, 2010
Continued....
My glasses are ready so I will probably be picking them up tomorrow. I will for sure shoot in them on the 21st when I have my shoot day. I will also be doing my birthday shoot since I didn't get to shoot it on the 10th like I thought I would (I ended up studying for my finals instead.) If you didn't know, school is over...yippee! I checked my class scores....and I ACED my classes. Still a third year freshman though lol.

Picture of the cat that I want to steal from the vet...and no I won't steal it!
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Old 05-14-2010, 08:37 AM   #110
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May 14, 2010
Don't you like when I'm bored...I take pictures!





My 22nd birthday is coming up so soon here. Honestly I'm not all that excited about it. I was going to celebrate it during Memorial day weekend but my friends were all like "Nooo! Las Vegas will be so expensive then. Let's go to Lake Havasu instead". Of course my friends being the flaky friends they are completely bailed out on Lake Havasu. What really irritates me is that I had planned on going to LV Friday through Sunday but then my friends were like "Nooo! If we are doing Rehab on Sunday then we don't want to have to leave early, all drunk to get to the airport on time." Well of course out of the 9 people that are going half of them are staying Friday through Sunday instead of Saturday through Monday. I can kind of understand though since Dallas has to go to school (she is in real estate school right now) and her boyfriend has work. I was hoping that everyone would stay at the Hardrock hotel (where I'm staying) but apparently nobody is staying there. It should be interesting to see how we coordinate everything. As long as everyone is on time to get on the party bus on Saturday then I will be happy. I was trying to get everyone to stay at the Hardrock because you get free passes to Rehab and the passes can get kind of expensive (like $50 for women and up to $150 for men.) But whatever, it's their money. I have to cancel the limo though since nobody is staying in the hotel with me (it would be kind of stupid to have only one or two people in a Cadillac Escalade stretch limo.) But then again, that saves me money to spend on random nick-nacks (did I spell that right?).

I really want to put Love Bug in this residential doggie boot camp. I thought it would be cool to train her myself....it would give us a chance to bond, but to be perfectly honest I'm way too much of a pushover to train her. She's totally gotten into the habit of begging for food...and of course I give it to her (though I would probably give it to her even if she was trained...I just don't want her to beg.) Plus I think she has wicked seperation anxiety. She's pooed in her kennel quite a few times even if I take her out right before I put her in. I assume that's because she's freaking out without me around. AND everytime I take her out of the kennel when I get back she completely freaks out on me. The doggie boot camp is pretty expensive (like $1,900 or something) and it lasts like 4 weeks but I think it could totally be worth it. The only things I would be concerned about is the other dogs around her and how they train her. I want the trainer to understand that when LB comes home that she will only be in her kennel when I have to leave (and that's not very often.) I don't want to have to put her in her kennel all the time. I would also want the trainer to train her to ring a doggie doorbell to go outside and potty. That would be so helpful to me. I've looked up the boot camp and they seem to be really good. I've found no complaints on them so far and the website gives a lot of info about what they do. I really want to get a cat for LB to have as a companion (though the cat has to be friendly to the chinchillas too.) I would love a cat that is super cuddly and very friendly like my old cat Idaho. I love this cat that I saw at the vet...she would've been perfect for me (picture in "continued" part of message).

EDC (Electric Daisy Carnival) is next month. This will be the second time I'm attending it. My friends kind of irritated me with the hotel situation here too. I was planning on staying at the Bonaventure Westin but my friend Mike was like "Nooo! Let's stay someplace cheaper and closer." So I started looking into it and we decided on staying at an Economy Inn or something similar. Well apparently it's the same distance away as the Bonaventure AND most of my friends aren't staying there...they are staying at the Bonaventure! So aggravating! The group this year going there is going to be huge. Dallas and I are wearing costumes like we did last time. One of the nights we are going as video game characters. I'm going as Yuna from Final Fantasy and I think Dallas is doing the Mario Brother's princess. The other night we are going as a cat and mouse. I am trying to get some of the guys to wear t-shirts that say "Cheese" or "Catnip" on it (I thought this was hillarious!). I actually need to get those t-shirts made pretty soon here.

My sister's 21st birthday was last weekend. We are Irish twins BTW. Irish twins are siblings that are the same age for a short period of time. We went to Romano's Macaroni Grill for dinner and Em started off with two fruity martinis while I had one sangria since I was going to be DD (designated driver.) We went back to my mom's place so everyone could get ready. My dad, Em's boyfriend, Em and I were the only one's who went (though that's the way Emily wanted it.) Nobody really knew where they wanted to go so I kind of forced everyone to go to American Junkie in old town Scottsdale. I payed for everyone's drinks there which ended up costing quite a bit. Emily had like 5 shots in the 30 minutes that we were there including a 3 Wise Men shot (I heard this shot was quite nasty but get's you really drunk.) We then went to this country bar in Cave Creek which was like 45 minutes away from old town. It was pretty interesting. I pretty much just sat by myself, drinking my Coke and eating peanuts while they all played pool. Emily was pretty drunk by this point (I think she had another 5 more shots there....her theme song that night was that song "Shots"..."shot, shot, shot, shot, shot...".) When the bar started clearing out we went to another country bar (this was at about 1 or 1:15...the bars here close at 2.) Everyone continued getting drunk. Emily and I had the best heart to heart conversation about our past and us not being able to show how much we love each other and things like that. I'm sure it was pretty funny to watch...two girls that don't look like they belong in a bar like that (though Em looked like she belonged there more than I did), holding hands, crying. I've got to admit I don't enjoy being around drunk people but being around my sister, her boyfriend, and dad was pretty amusing. The drive home was interesting to say the least. Emily kept shaking her booty right in front of my face while was trying to drive. We had to stop on the side of the road because all of them needed to pee. I thought it was hillarious how they were all lined up peeing (though I was kind of worried about a cop seeing and giving them a ticket for public indecency...though I'm sure my sister would've tried to talk him/her out of it since it was her birthday.) What sucks is that I couldn't even go straight home when I dropped them off. I had to pick up one of my friends because he didn't have his vehicle and drive him to his place...though it was only 10 minutes away from my house.

The next day was mother's day. I don't know how hungover everyone was...I'm sure it was pretty bad. We were supposed to do a bbq but mom decided to cancel it and went to the movies instead with dad. I'm going to give her the mother's day gifts I got her (a necklace, a sunflower windchimes, and a bunch of home videos that I had converted to DVD's) on Saturday when I go over to their house for dad's birthday. We are going to Famous Dave's and then going to see some movie (hopefully it's not Bounty Hunter or Date Night since I just saw it, though I know it won't be Iron Man 2 since my mom and dad just saw that.) Actually I just realized that we are going to see Robin Hood which should be pretty cool.

I had to get some cavities filled the other day. I've never had cavities before so it was kind of weird to get this procedure done. I guess the cavities were really deep because they had to drill into the teeth and fill them. I was so freaked out about getting the anesthetic shot. I scheduled the appointment later in the day so I would for sure get enough sleep and I ate a little before the appointment (I try to do these things so I don't pass out when I get stuck with the needle.) It's really weird because I hate needles and always get super faint when I have to get shots or get blood drawn but the thought of doing it to someone else doesn't really freak me out that much. Anyhoo so they had to give me 5 anesthetic shots which I thought was a little much but turned out to be perfect. The drilling wasn't bad at all and didn't really faze me though it was super cold on my teeth. The only thing that sucked was keeping my mouth open really wide the whole time (it took like an hour to do.) There was one point were my jaw started quivering and I couldn't really keep it open. My mouth still kind of hurts. I can keep my mouth open pretty long hehe...but that was a little too long for me. It was weird how much of my face was numb. I couldn't feel myself breathing and my eyes were numb too. When I got home I noticed that I had snot running all down my face. Hopefully that wasn't there for too long. Unfortunately they still have to fill in another spot. That appoinment is in another two weeks I think.
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Old 05-20-2010, 09:32 AM   #111
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May 20, 2010
2:30 in the morning. Still up (completely typical of me though.) Just got done editing 2 1/2 candid photo sets. Took me about 3 hours to do. Should probably go to bed soon since I have a busy day tomorrow (got to get my nails done, my tires changed, and LB groomed.)




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Old 05-20-2010, 09:33 AM   #112
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Old 05-20-2010, 09:34 AM   #113
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Old 05-21-2010, 07:26 AM   #114
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May 21, 2010
Hey everyone, I finally made an Amazon wish list. There is some pretty interesting stuff on there.

AMAZON WISH LIST
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Old 05-22-2010, 04:55 AM   #115
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May 21, 2010
Todays shoot went fantastic! I got to meet Geezer (one of my members here) and I got to see T-Bone Thomas again for the second time. They assisted my shoot (and took some pictures during it) and we had a really tasty lunch together with FTVRob. I got an "Earth Goddess" video and picture shoot done (yet again shot in another purple outfit), my 22nd birthday video and picture (I wanted to do my first squirt scene but it didn't happen...also didn't get as much pictures as I normally do for this shoot ) and a dressy, public resort video shoot (didn't get as much video footage as I normally do for this shoot.) But all in all today went great.

Here are some pics from today



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Old 05-26-2010, 01:42 AM   #116
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May 25, 2010

4 DAYS TILL MY 22ND BIRTHDAY!

Some of you were requesting pictures of me in my glasses so here they are.




This one was taken a few days ago.
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Old 05-28-2010, 12:29 AM   #117
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May 27, 2010
I forgot to show you this site that I was on. If you are a Packers fan then you should LOVE it!
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Old 06-02-2010, 12:30 AM   #118
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June 1, 2010
My dog seriously just took a poo on my book right during my webcam schedule. Guess she doesn't like the Kings and Queens of England and Scotland.
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Old 06-04-2010, 06:53 AM   #119
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June 3, 2010
Listening to Sneaker Pimps "6 Underground" by far one of the sexiest songs on Earth.

Honestly it's kind of depressing going through my website statistics on CCBill. I get thoroughly p!ssed when I see the chargeback numbers (a big F U to people who do that....I hope you burn in hell!) and especially when people cancel from my website and list the reason as "unsatisfied". What the heck are you unsatisfied about? Everything that is in the members area is listed in the non-members area. You pretty much see everything you are going to get before even entering the members area. I've covered pretty much everything that I can...and plan on covering a lot more in the future. I probably shouldn't be telling people how much this affects me (not that it really does all that much...just when I go on CCBill and I've only recently gotten a logon for the site.) I'm tempted to go through every single account and contact them and ask why they put down that they are unsatisfied (though that could take a pretty long time.) I always get a kick out of when people list their cancellation reason as "minor used card" (I have about 13 of those so far this year)....that's pretty sneaky! Glad to see that I'm popular with the under 18 crowd . Looking at the statistics it looks like the Americans seem to be the shadiest people. They are the ones who are getting refunds and doing other shady stuff. SHAME ON YOU! I completely understand listing "fraud" on the cancellation reason...actually I've had my card stolen and used only to join up on various porn sites (I got a kick out of that after I had gotten over the fact that someone stole the info in the first place.)

Today was a pretty busy day for me. I got my nails done, my eyebrows waxed, and my eyelashes done. I also got a smoothie (same kind as usual....passionfruit cove...kind of craving one right now) and went to Best Buy to buy the little tapes for the little video cameras but they were completely sold out so I bought a purple memory stick, a new charger for my camera, and some speakers for the computer Robbie Robhead gave me for my birthday/Christmas present. I was so tempted to buy a Flip Ultra HD camcorder (it's the perfect size to carry around in your purse for a random candid video) but since I'm trying to be less frivolous and financially responsible this year I decided it wouldn't be the best thing to do (though it would be tax deductible!) I was supposed to get airbrushed tanned but was so tired when I got home that I ended up taking a nap instead.

Since I am a total hypochondriac I know think I have hypersomnia....or maybe I have narcolepsy. Either way I tend to sleep at least 10-12 hours at night and then still want to nap during the day. I have an annual physical coming up so I will have to ask my doctor about that. I assume that I will have to do a sleep study at a sleep clinic, but how do you test for hypersomnia? I mean I assume that they will let you sleep as long as you want (I hope they do at least otherwise I will be grouchy as heck when they wake me up), but do they also keep you there like 24 hours to see how long you sleep?
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Old 06-11-2010, 09:35 PM   #120
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June 11, 2010
Should I call/text him or not? I met this Englishman in Vegas last weekend at the Rehab pool party. I was totally not expecting to hook up at all in Vegas since I'm not into one night stands and generally don't like meeting people in a club type atmosphere. But we got along really well. The funny thing is I was the one to approach him (which is highly unusual for me). I was hanging out around his area for like an hour with my friends before I found an excuse to say hi. He was digging around in his man purse and I thought he was looking for suntan lotion (he has that super white English skin that seems to burn really easy) so I did a total ninja move and whipped out my lotion asking him if he needed any (apparently he was looking for a camera...not suntan lotion.) He's very funny and doesn't take any crap from me (which is a good thing since I need a guy that can "dish it" right back to me....Dallas says that we both like guys that have a teensie bit of a$$holish quality to them...I would disagree and say that I just like it when a guy can stand up to me and take charge like a real man should.) He's also very charming and has fabulous manners. We ended up spending Sunday and Monday together and I extended my trip to Tuesday so that I could spend an extra day with him. I feel so stupid because the last night I ended up crying a bit in front of him. I just get attached so easy and tend to fall in love really quick (not that I'm saying I'm in love with him or anything.) The thing is I can really only be with one person at a time. When I'm given my "heart/emotions" to someone the thought of being with anyone else is just so unappealing an that's what is happening right now. Dallas thinks I'm crazy and that I should look for someone else (especially since he lives in London) but I really can't. He knows about my website and is totally cool with it (I showed him a few of the videos). We talked about him visiting and I told him that since I work from home I could visit pretty much anytime. I know there is a weird unspoken rule about not calling or texting for three days, but I find that completely ridiculous. Dallas doesn't think I should call or text and that I should wait for him to do it first. I've added him on Facebook (actually I did that Sunday night) and he hasn't yet accepted my friendship request. Grr....I really want to cry right now. I'm so tired of all the mind games and B.S. that comes with relationships. Last night while reading a book I almost started crying because the main characters relationship seemed so perfect to me...something I definitely want and seem to have been looking for, for so long now. I seem to always have people tell me to enjoy being single and young but honestly I was never one to really like being single.

So anyways, Vegas was a lot of fun. The plane ride there was really easy. I ended up riding with Mike (Dallas' room mate) since everyone else was already in Vegas. The only people who went was Mike, Dallas, Dallas' boyfriend, Nikko, and Dave. I totally forgot my phone in Arizona and was supposed to meet up with one of my members at the Pink Taco a couple hours after I landed but wasn't able to since I couldn't figure out where he was. I ended up hanging around the Rehab pool where Pink Taco is hoping that maybe the member would recognize me. It was pretty freaking hot there and I was already pretty irritated because the Rehab pool people wouldn't let me bring my video camera with me into the pool area so I had to check it. My room also wasn't ready until a couple hours later (but that was okay since they upgraded my room.) What also sucks is that the room rate I got (I ended up getting a 20% discount when I called in to change the room dates) didn't include passes to Rehab so I really didn't save any money at all. The hotel room was very spacious which I was very happy about. At about 6 o'clock Dallas and I went to the Mac cosmetics store to get our makeup done. They were already super busy when we got there and when we tried to talk to someone about setting up a makeup makeover time the lady turned away and started helping these other girls. We were in a huge rush because the party bus was supposed to be at our hotel at 8 and it would take about an hour to get the makeup done and an hour to get ready, so we ended up complaining to the manager and she got us in about 10 minutes later which was so cool of her. The makeup job they did on me was absolutely gorgeous.



We did end up being late to get on the party bus but that was because of Rob F (Dallas' bf), Dave, and Nikko. We had the party bus for 4 hours so we drove around Las Vegas the whole time. We went back to the hotel to pick up some of our friends who live in Vegas....which Mike was all happy about since that meant he wasn't girlless anymore. The girls that we picked up were pretty interesting. One of them ended up getting completely trashed and kept on offering to lick my ***** (which I would've gladly accepted if Dave, Nikko, and Rob F weren't on the bus.) Her friend and her also got completely naked and started traumatizing Nikko which made her boyfriend Dave mad. Mean while me being the completely sober one I go over and try to diffuse the situation. We ended off our night at Rain which was also another fiasco. Mike ended up disappearing with the two girls from Vegas...we later found out that he had an all night threesome with them. We met our LA friends Scott and a girlfriend and David who was there for the poker tournament. Scott was supposed to get us into Rain but apparently we weren't on the list (which he had been told we were) so we had to wait in another line for about 45 minutes while the group tried to figure out what to do. We were able to make it in because Scott finally talked to the right person and got us passes in. Rain was a ton of fun but the group ended up splitting up so I ended up spending most of the night with David. I met some guy and girl from Vancouver. They were a ton of fun and we went to Drai's afterhours club with them at about 2:30.

I only got about 3 or 4 hours of sleep on Saturday night so I was kind of iffy about going to Rehab and having to sit in the sun all day but I am so glad I did. Mike's old ex had a table near the Englishman I was writing about earlier so that's how I ended up around him. I really didn't drink much that day since I didn't want to get sun stroke (and alcohol tends to bring it on quicker.) Dallas was all excited because there was several times that the Rehab t.v. show cameras were on her. We ended up staying all day (I stayed even longer because I was hanging out with the Brit.) Dallas and Rob left because Rob had to catch a flight in a couple hours since he had to be at work the next day. That night Dallas, Mike and I met up with the Brit's group who had a table at Vanity. I loved the set up of the club but the music was terrible. None of my group really listens to rap or hip hop and that was really all they were playing. We didn't stay there too long...maybe until 3 or so then we all went back to my room and crashed out for the night. Monday we went to the Rio buffet. I absolutely love that buffet but the only reason I really go there is for crab legs and they weren't serving them at that time. Dallas and Mike ended up taking off for the airport while I went with my Brit to his hotel were we ended up crashing out again until later on that night. We didn't really do much that night since none of them wanted to get so drunk that they would be hungover on the 10 hour flight the next day. We ate at Outback (btw the sangrias there are pretty good), rode on the New York, New York roller coaster (my Brit didn't because he is scared of heights), then him and I went back to the hotel room while the rest of them went to the hotel bar. Tuesday day was spent walking around the Caesar's Forum shops. I didn't know this but apparently England doesn't have Victoria's Secret, so one of the guys was buying a bunch of body spray from there for his girlfriend (who he also met in Vegas the year before...she lived in Canada and moved to England to be with him and they've been together for 9 months now).

Leaving my Brit sucked big time. I'm really not sure if we will ever talk again. I really hope so because I really, really like him and can definitely see myself with him (and yes I know I've only known him for a few days...but so what....I believe in love at first sight and soul mates.) I have a bunch of presents from you guys that I have to do a video log for. I got a printer from someone but I think FTVRob accidentally took the gift tag off of it because I can not figure out who it's from. The other day I went out to eat at the Persian Room (one of my favorite restaurants) with FTVRob then we watched about 4 hours of Heroes. Yesterday was pretty busy for me. Dallas came over and we worked out together. We also went to the mall for books on juicing diets, Victoria's Secret clothing (which I really didn't need), and random stuff for my house. We also went to Petsmart were I almost adopted a kitten. Thank gawd I talked myself out of it because I don't even have all the necessary items for a cat yet.

I have a shoot this Sunday. I will be doing my 4th of July update and a shoot with Love Bug. I bought some very cute clothes for the both of us to wear during the shoot.
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Old 06-12-2010, 02:53 AM   #121
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June 11, 2010
7:47 PM
Okay so the Brit finally texted me back. But the thing is I texted him at like 3:33 and he didn't get back to me until 7:29 (so 2:29 AM his time.) We sent a total of 7 messages to each other (4 from me) and his last text was that he just woke up for a glass of water and was going back to sleep. What the hell! Like seriously, I'm trying to figure out A)why he took so long to text me back, B)why he didn't contact me like a couple days ago and C)why it seems like he's being distant. I mean of course it could be that he spent 10 days in Vegas and 20 hours traveling between countries. He told me the reason he didn't add me on Facebook is because he rarely goes on there but that he would add me next time he's on there. I really think I'm reading way into all of this and I hate it! This is why I don't date because trying to figure out what the other person thinks and feels about you is way too difficult. I figure that obviously he wants to keep in touch with me still because he did get back to my text. I am not liking this at all. I don't feel like going out at all tonight but Dallas really thinks I should (but then again this is the same girl that thinks I should be taking pictures with tons of guys so that when the Brit does accept my FB request he will see how popular I am with the guys.)
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Old 06-14-2010, 09:03 PM   #122
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June 14, 2010
Okay so I think I'm going to have to give up on the Brit. I realize that it's really only been like a week since we've seen each other and he may not like talking or texting on phones. What gets me is that when I went on his Facebook page to see if he finally added me I saw that he changed his profile picture and didn't add me. Now it takes a lot longer to change your profile picture than it does to press the "accept" button and add someone as your friend. I'm thinking he may have a girlfriend or he isn't that interested in me (which I can't believe since I got a text message from him saying that he "missed a certain someone" which I assume is me.) If he has a girlfriend I am going to be so p!ssed because he told me he didn't and I am not okay at all being the "other person". I don't like cheaters and I don't like being unknowingly involved in cheating. I just don't know what to do. Part of me wants to call or text him or even message him on Facebook and ask him what's going on. I really probably should give it up but then again I'm not a quitter at all and I had an amazing time with him and thought that things could work out even though we live thousands of miles away from each other. What I don't understand is how I'm not completely jaded at guys considering how much I get lied to. Honestly I should become a private detective because I ALWAYS find out about people lying to me. I wonder what the Brit would think if he read these journal entries about him. Personally I would be flattered but knowing my luck he would probably think I'm crazy.

So the shoot yesterday went very well. Love Bug was a total superstar. We started off doing the shoot with her at this office building park that totally reminded me of Texas. LB had a blast running around, smelling things. The next shoot was a sexy dressy shoot in the pink dress and white heels that I wore for my birthday celebration in the party bus in Vegas. We ended up getting caught by this one employee there. He was really nice about it, even apologized and said he wasn't looking as he was walking to the restroom. When he came out though he suggested that we leave which we did after taking a few more pictures. FTVRob and I went out to eat at this one restaurant Blanco's with some of Rob's friends. I will never eat there again...the service was incredibly slow and it took us an hour and a half to order, get our food, eat it and go. Though we did shoot a little bit in the restaurant so that kind of made up for it. After that we went back to the FTV house and shot my 4th of July shoot.
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Old 07-13-2010, 10:08 PM   #123
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July 13, 2010
I just banned my first forum member ever. I will absolutely not put up with racist remarks. People make me so mad sometimes. I don't understand why people would take their time to go on a website just to make racist remarks. I realize that everyone has their own beliefs and I respect that but there is a point were you are taking it too freaking far.

End rant...so right now I am totally enjoying my life. I'm in San Diego still. Not sure when I will be leaving to go back home, probably sometime this week. I still have yet to do a photoshoot so I've been hanging out with friends and working/editing. I also went to a bonsai class on Sunday morning. Tomorrow night I will be attending some business class on copyrighting. Should be interesting. I also attended a Rotary ceremony with my friend. I'm definitely interested in joining Rotary now and since I have enough free time for it I think it would be great to do so. I've only had a couple issues being here. One is that it's so loud here. My friends play music like all day/night long (at least they play good Electronic music which I totally love.) Also the next door neighbors are super loud and you can hear like everything they say. It's kind of weird for me since I'm so used to being by myself and the apartments that I live in are incredibly quiet. The other issue is the heat and humidity in the house. The apartment my friends live in is super old and has no air conditioning. I keep my apartment at about 65 degrees all the time so it's been kind of hard dealing with the heat. But when I get outside it's absolutely fabulous. I love how cold it is here....especially since it's summer.

I am not looking foward to the drive back home (it's a terribly boring 5 1/2 hour drive through the blandest desert landscape ever!) I ended up driving instead of flying because A) I needed my car to get around and B) I wanted LB with me but wasn't ready to fly with her yet. Plus I can stay how ever long I want to without having to constantly change my flight.

LB is doing fantastic here now. At first she was super skittish (she still kind of is.) She kept peeing and pooing in my friends house but hasn't done it for a couple days now which I am very happy about. Apparently my friends thought my dog was way older than 6 months. They told me that I treat her like an adult dog and not a puppy. But the books that I read stated that she should be trained by now hence why I treat her like she's older. I really want to take her to a doggie park so she can play with some other dogs. There is also a doggie beach park here too which I would absolutely love to see her play in. She's never been in the water so it should be interesting to see how she reacts to it.

EDC (Electric Daisy Carnival in LA) was absolutely fantastic this year. Definitely better than last year. Like last year we got VIP tickets (the only way to go since VIP is 21+ and the rest of the festival isn't). VIP was pretty cool but it definitely wasn't as awesome as last year. Last year they has photo booths, a hookah booth, a massage booth, an airbrush tattoo booth, and people walking around with candy. This year they cleared everything out and just put in a lot of seating areas (which is very much needed when you are running around in 6 inch moon boots.) Another one of the minuses is the bathroom set up for the females. They have tons of bathrooms for guys but only two trailer bathrooms for the girls. The dj's were amazing. I met some new friends all of whom live in San Diego. Dallas completely forgot her ticket like 10 minutes into the cab ride to EDC so we had to turn around to grab them...I'm surprised at the patience cab drivers have. The first night I dressed up as a mouse (Dallas dressed up as a slutty cat .) I got a ton of compliments on my costume which was very surprising since I thought Dallas would be the one getting all the compliments. I always think it's funny when I get VIP tickets since the main draw of VIP is the open bar (only vodka and beer though) and I don't usually drink that much. I got recognized in public by one of my fans too. I was so excited when he told me that he knew who I was. We ended up hanging out a bit and he also got to meet some of my friends. I was totally ready to after party (I think I had one of those 5 hour energy shots beforehand) but none of my friends wanted to since they wanted to be rested for the next night. Trying to get a cab that night was a huge pain. We ended up walking 2 miles and finally found one (though I had to pay $40 for a $10 cab ride...totally worth it though!).

The second day Dallas and I were supposed to get our makeup done by a professional makeup artist. She ended up being an hour and a half late because of traffic (the same traffic we got stuck in the day before.) Dallas is fairly inpatient so she ended up flaking out and decided to do her makeup herself. I loved getting my makeup done. Since we were going as bumblebees I got a black, yellow, and gold makeup makeover done. I got a ton of compliments on this costume too...but that could also be because my costume lit up. I met this really cool guy there who also lives in San Diego (we'll call him D). We ended up hanging out most of the night. My friends left me at EDC and went to Avalon. I was kind of irritated with them since the only person who told me they were all leaving was my friend Monty. It ended up being a good thing though since I got to hang out with D who also drove me back to the hotel (absolutely perfect since I did not want to have to through the whole cab fiasco again.) We also ended up going about 10 feet away from the main stage while Paul Van Dyk was playing. D had those Fukoku vibrating gloves (you might have seen them on one of Lia19's updates). Anyways he used those to get us up to the front of the stage by touching people. I absolutely loved the look on people's faces when we would touch them with the glove. At first they would be all startled like "WTF was that?!" then they would get this look on their face like "OMG more please!"...it was hillarious. They parted like Moses and the red sea. Trying to get to sleep that night was a huge pain. My next door neighbor was after partying and they were playing their music incredibly loud. At first I was like "heck yeah, I could sleep to this" until I realized that I actually can't sleep when there is any type of sound. I had to call security on them twice before they finally turned it off.

The flight back wasn't bad especially since I had Dallas with me. I've been doing a lot better when flying recently but I assumed that would happen since I've been flying a ton (Southwest luvs me!) We had a total pig out day when we got back to my house. I think it's hillarious when Dallas and I have days like that. She was running around my house in a t-shirt and no pants or underwear.
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Old 07-27-2010, 07:42 PM   #124
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July 26, 2010
I'm so silly. I'm making a list of male and female talent that I would like to "get with" hehe. Going to make a collage and post it up for you guys in a bit.

2:30 PM
Okay so here are the females that I want to get with




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Old 07-27-2010, 09:42 PM   #125
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Continued...

And here is the male talent I want to get with


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Old 09-03-2010, 08:34 AM   #126
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September 3, 2010
Wow...it's been such a long time since I've written a new journal entry. It's interesting too because honestly it doesn't feel like a long time. Of course I have been traveling a ton like normal and am pretty busy with friends and school. School started about a week ago. I'm taking English and Math this semester (not going to take any more than that since I will be traveling even more than I did last year.) My English class is already making me take a look at the word I'm using incorrectly. It's kind of driving me insane to be honest. I've also noticed that I say certain words way too much like...like lol. One of my goals is to stop cursing and stop saying "like", "um", "uh" (there's other words to that I would like to stop using as much but I can't really think of them right now.)

Love Bug is doing great. She did get in an accident (she fell down the stairs) about two or three weeks ago. It absolutely terrified me. When she fell she just layed there on the ground for about five minutes not moving or anything. I ran over to her, checked her purse, and started giving her mouth to mouth CPR. Driving to the vet was absolutely horrible. I was completely distraught and got lost a couple times. I was also having full blown panic attacks and was hypervenhilating. It would've been so embarassing fainting in front of the vet because of LB's injury. The vet was super cute to which didn't make it any better since I was a complete nutcase. So anyways they did a couple x-rays of LB and told me that she had a "mild to moderate" spinal injury. They gave me some pain pills and anti-inflammatories for her and said that she needed to be on "bed rest" for about a month which is pretty much what she does anyways (she's not to active of a dog and usually just cuddles with me most the day.)

Since the last time I updated my journal I've done two shoots. One was with this really cute younger guy who is training to replace FTVRob as the photographer and videographer for FTVGirls. I like his work but nothing really compares to FTVRob's...and it seems like his pictures aren't as vibrant as Rob's. I think he could do very well if he just continues training. He's also fairly quite....at least he isn't a creeper though. We did two photo/video updates. One of them was at an office building in my black Bebe dress where I did a panty stuffing scene. I ended up making the video of that a candid behind the scenes video. Apparently that was also the newbie photog's first time doing spreads...made it kind of weird for me lol though he was totally cool about it. The other video was at a bank in a white skirt and yellow spaghetti strap shirt. We did a masturbation scene there though I didn't get off and got really p!ssed off about. I ended up throwing the toy and cursing because I was so frustrated. At least I don't fake it.

The last shoot I did was in the end of last month. Renna Ryann (www.RennaRyann.com) our newest FTVCash contract star flew over from Florida. I don't know why but for whatever reason I thought she lived in LA. The flight from Florida to AZ is about 5 hours long and she had to wake up super early but she wasn't as tired as I thought she would be (actually she had more energy than I did.) I picked her up at the airport and we went back to my apartment so she could help me pick out clothes to shoot with (we both wanted to kind of match). The first set we did was in an office building. It was an awesome location and would've been an awesome shoot if it weren't so darn hot outside. Renna loved it...apparently the Florida humidity is way worse than the 105 degree dry heat which I can completely understand having lived in Texas but I was still sweating like crazy. Altogether we got 3 professional video and photo updates shot (the hot, office building one, one in sexy dresses doing oral, and another in casual clothes in the pink room with a cucumber.) We also did a candid video shoot in the big FTV house comparing how deep we could get the famous FTV toys (the Big 10, the FTV Monster, etc.). I know that Renna also did quite a bit of shooting by herself. She ended up staying the night at the FTV house (I offered to let her stay in my guest bedroom but she didn't want to bother me). We had a really nice dinner at the Cheesecake Factory and was going to see a movie but couldn't because of the time. A little bit after I dropped her off she called me asking me how to turn the lights on in the main bedroom. I guess she is kind of scared of the dark so I also ended up getting kind of creeped out too lol.

My San Diego/San Francisco trip in the beginning of August was fun. We didn't stay in SD for to long since we had to be at a friends martial arts tournament in Campbell (about 30 minutes outside of SF). The drive up to SF was pretty long but didn't really seem that way since there was a group of us. The tournament was fun to watch and definitely made me want to start taking self defense classes. I personally would love to take Krav Magaw classes and have looked into it here. Apparently they have about 4 or 5 schools here that teach it. In San Francisco we stayed at the Intercontinental. I got the most awesome room ever. There were floor to ceiling windows around half the room. I got this amazing cheese plate (if I ever see a cheese plate on a menu I have to order it.) One of the cheeses was awfully smelly though and ended up stinking up the room for a night. I thought it was hillarious. We went to this Japanese tapas restaurant. I've had Spanish tapas but never Japanese tapas so I talked my friend into going. I ended up ordering some of the weirdest things on the menu (if only just to say I've tried it). I got chicken hearts, beef tongue, and a couple other really odd dishes. Honestly the best thing I ordered there was the fried cheese . The next day we did a massage at Tru Spa (the same spa I went to last time I visited SF...love that place). We got lost getting there like two times. I was absolutely frustrated by the time we got there. We also visited Pier 39 where I got this cool Scottish knife with a blue stone in the hilt. There was also a fairy shop that I didn't get to go into last time I visited the pier but luckily it was open this time.

I got Dallas a few things since it was her birthday (which I ended up missing...though to be honest I really didn't know when she was celebrating it and I had prepaid for the room already so wasn't able to cancel.) I really did feel awful for missing her birthday. She was pretty upset with me for a while and wasn't really talking to me. I ended up making her these awesome Happy Birthday posters and cupcakes to which said "Happy Belated B-Day" (the car ride over to her house ended up smearing the letters so you couldn't read what it said.)Her birthday present is a "couples" massage and facial with me. I've taken my sister and a couple other friends to do massage and facials...they always love it.



This week has been kind of crazy. I've been in party mode for some reason. I've joked with Dallas that I'm becoming an "Amazon Dallas". She's such a social butterfly and loves to go out so we've been side kicks this whole week. Last Saturday was awesome. We did a girls night out and started at American Junkie. There was only five of us (well four since one of the girls ended up staying at Junkie). After that we went to White House which honestly I didn't really care for. Maybe it was because I wasn't really in the mood to be there....I think it was the music. I don't really care for hip hop (which that club was playing a lot of) so wasn't all that into that club. Plus I was getting highly annoyed at the guys around us. There were these two idiots that kept on taking my fedora off even when I told them to stop. That's a complete no-no...it's like messing with a girls hair when it's all done up but even worse since my hair looked like crap underneath the hat.



Afterpartying that night was awesome though. We stayed up until the sun rose...and then some. I love going to chill little house parties especially since quite a few of my friends DJ.

Tuesday night we went to Sapporo's for our girlfriend's birthday dinner. I've done tapanaki there about three times and everytime I get such a kick out of watching the chefs prepare the food. Wednesday night Dallas and I went to a couple lingerie stores to find costumes for Nocturnal festival this month in San Bernadino. I'm doing a purple, silver, and black theme. I already bought purple and black leg fluffys and sparkly purple and silver wrist fluffys. I also got purple fishnet hose and black fishnet arm gloves. Wednesday night I bought a really tiny black lacey skirt and some tiny booty shorts to go underneath. I'm probably going to buy a purple corset since I can't seem to find the right shirt for the outfit. And then there are these awesome hair "falls" that I'm going to have made in dark and light purple. I'm going to do my hair like Sailor Moon...overall I think it's going to look fantastic. After we went shopping we went to eat at FEZ which is this gay bar/restaurant in downtown Phoenix. I had the most amazing pesto Caesar salad ever. They even had key lime pie martinis which was really interesting since the only place I've ever seen those was in Salem, Massachusetts when I went there for Halloween in '07 I think it was. After FEZ we went to American Junkie where we ended up staying the rest of the night.
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Old 09-13-2010, 01:12 AM   #127
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Sept. 12, 2010
I am about 90% sure that this will be my costume for this Halloween. I will be going as Queen Anne Boleyn (but with my head.) If I do decide to go as Queen Anne I will have to order the costume within the next few days since it's all custom made and will take about a month to make. I'm pretty excited about it though and think that it will definitely be the most extravagant costume at whatever party I attend. Speaking of Halloween parties...I'm probably going to stay here for Halloween since I will be traveling two of the other weekends in the month of October. I will be going to Big Bear, CA for Oktoberfest again like I did last year with all my friends. The cabin we are renting is even nicer than the one we got last year. It has a jacuzzi in the back which I'm sure we will end up using (though if it's anything like last year it will be super cold.) I will also be attending Monster Massive in LA for the first time ever. I'm trying to get my friends to dress up as Final Fantasy characters since I have the Yuna costume from Final Fantasy 12 (at least I think it's 12.) My friend Andrew is down to do a FF theme and Dallas seems okay with it to as long as I can find something "slutty" for her to wear (and yes she did request her costume be slutty.)



Love Bug got spayed on Thursday. She is doing very well. She hasn't been messing with her stitches at all which makes me pretty happy though I do keep the Elizabethan collar on her when I'm not at home. She does not seem to like the collar at all though after the first 5 minutes of wearing it she didn't try to take it off.


I also received my purple/black furry boot covers, fingerless fishnet gloves, furry black choker, and glittery purple/black bracelets for my Nocturnal costume. Instead of buying a shirt like I thought I would have to I found a sexy black almost gothic looking shirt that I've had for years now and have never worn. It will work perfectly though it covers everything in the front (it has a very high neckline...up to my throat). The back is connected by straps so I will have to tighten it somehow...probably with safety pins. Overall it will be a lot "darker" look than I normally go for...but it will work.

The boot covers...there are three colors (light purple, dark purple and black) but the dark purple and black seem to blend together in this picture.


The fairy wings I got for LB....like mother, like daughter. She loves them to and didn't once try to take them off.
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Old 09-16-2010, 09:00 AM   #128
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Sept. 17, 2010
I wonder if I should start adding the journal entries as an update. I know of a few solo site girls who do that. It might also bring more attention to my journal updates since I am sure there are some members who only go on the forum to just look at the updates listing thread.

Sometimes I hate reading other people's blogs (well hate might be a little too strong of a word.) I went onto a blog today of a very well known porn star. She writes very eloquently...to a point that I almost felt...well dumbed down in a sense. I know I'm a smart girl, no doubt about that. But it's times like that when I realize that there are so many other people who are way smarter than me and for whatever reason that makes me feel incredibly dumb. It not only makes me feel dumb it makes me feel like I couldn't be an author (my back up job to being a doctor.) That especially happens when reading some books. I just think about how unlikely it is that I will ever be able to write as well as they do. I have a hard time expressing myself also. The words and thoughts are in my brain but trying to get them out...well it's incredibly difficult.

I watched some of the dirty cartoon porn that CaptnJack sent me. It's pretty hot stuff (though quite old...it is vintage cartoon porn though.) I also ended up watching a gay sex dvd which I also very much love. Being in a relationship with two very hot bisexual men who only have eyes for me (and of course each other) is my ultimate fantasy. I think that became my fantasy after reading the Anita Blake series by Laurell K Hamilton. I also just read book called Fairyville which was super, super hot. It's the first book I've ever read that had a full on gay sex scene in it with the most delicious descriptions about it. BTW delicious is one of the words that I actually really don't like saying. It kind of creeps me out for some reason.

I hate my upstairs neighbors. I think it's only a couple with their dog. They are just incredibly noisy. For about two days I had to listen to them having the world's loudest sex. The walls in my apartment are pretty thick. I've really never been able to hear my past neighbors, so the fact that I can hear the female screaming her head off during sex definitely shows she is being way too loud. I haven't heard anything tonight thank gawd. I hope that their next door neighbors complained about the noise. The sex noise wouldn't be so bad if they weren't going at it like bunnies. I mean all freaking day and night. Not to mention that they let their stupid dog bark incessantly when I know they are home, they walk around like they weigh a ton, and they play their awful music almost as loud as her bed voice (though to be fair I've only had to listen to their music once.) I figured I would wait it out and see if we have another noisy night before complaining to the apartment managers. Plus to be perfectly honest, it's incredibly uncomfortable hearing someone have sex when you haven't gotten laid in a long time .
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Old 09-18-2010, 09:58 AM   #129
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Sept. 18, 2010
Okay so I've started adding journal entries as an update. It took me forever to plug them all in on the update thread. I also calculated that I have about 612 updates including the journal entries and webcam shows. That would mean I've updated my website about 1.2 a day. So for those of you who don't think I update enough...look at the numbers! For a solo site to be updating pretty much once a day is awesome. I have over 35,000 MB of video...and that's only my professional videos. My longest professional video is almost 20 minutes long. I haven't yet figured out how many pictures I have on the site...that would take quite a bit longer since I would have to go through every file and add them up.

By the way, we finally got the webcam issues fixed. Anoree and the tech guy pretty much did that without me (thanks so much Anoree). I'm acing my classes right now. I've been super weird about constantly checking my grades (like they would change overnight or something lol). Things have kind of switched around one me. English is kind of rougher than normal and math is actually going quite easy for me for once in my life. It sucks though because it seems like every week we have some sort of paper due in English. Personally I wouldn't mind just testing out of it but I've stuck with it so far so I think I'll just suffer through the next 12 weeks or so that we have left.

Love Bug is incredibly surprising. Somehow she has learned the command "stay". It's pretty awesome walking out of a room, telling her to "stay", and coming back and her being right where she was when I left...though sometimes she'll move around. But she seems to get the idea that I don't want to her following me around the house sometimes. Now if only I can get her to stop going potty in the house.

I did a spa day with Dallas on Thursday. Her birthday was in August and I told her that I would take her to get a facial and massage. I absolutely love spa days...and it's so much fun when you have someone with you. I've taken about four people on a "couples" spa day so far. The day spa I go to is also amazing. I recently found out about a massage membership they have. You pay $49 a month and you get a free massage. What's great is that if you don't use that months massage it just accumulates. Plus, if you want to get any more massages besides the one you get free it's only $49. Hehe...I feel like a spokesperson right now. I know I'm going to end up spending a lot of time there though.
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Old 09-21-2010, 12:20 PM   #130
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Sept. 21, 2010
My neighbors woke me up with their loud sex. Definitely going to complain tomorrow (well today.) I got my lashes done last night. The lash lady had purple lashes so I got some put in with the normal black ones. They look pretty cool, though you can't really see them unless they are in the sunlight. I went shopping with Dallas yesterday...got a bunch of awesome stuff. I got a new bra and t-shirt from Victoria's Secret. Actually the t-shirts that I get from VS are my favorite shirts ever. I've bought about 5 or 6 of them now in different colors. I also bought this really funky fuzzy hood with bunny ears on it. It's pretty cute and I plan on wearing it when I'm snowboarding. I also got some makeup from Ulta for Nocturnal this weekend and we went to Michael's and got a bunch of beads to make jewelry.

I was pretty bored so I started Googling "Danielle FTV" and found my Alexa stats. It's pretty interesting to read about the "average" person who visits my site. Apparently the age group that is "over represented" is "18-24" and "55-64". Most of them don't have children. Also the education groups that are "over represented" are people that have "no college" or "graduate school". I thought that was pretty interesting. Here are the Alexa stats if you want to see them.

Today I need to do my English writing assignment, visit a tailor to get my body measurements for my Halloween costume, order my Halloween costume, update my website (actually I need to edit the video first...not sure why I didn't do that like two months ago when it was shot), do some video logs (super late on those), and renew my lease. I will probably be buying a house when my lease ends next year. I've been thinking about it for a while now and since it's the "best time to buy" (according to my realtor friends) and "I'm wasting money" (also according to my realtor friends) I think it's finally time I take the plunge. I should also probably go grocery shopping since I have absolutely no food in my house. Well I mean I have food but it's not food that I can just take out of the fridge and eat immediately (which I really prefer.)
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Old 09-28-2010, 07:21 PM   #131
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Sept. 28, 2010
Nocturnal this year was a total bust. It almost makes me not want to go to Monster Massive in LA next month but unfortunately I kind of have to since I told my friends I would and agreed to dress up in my Final Fantasy Yuna Gunner costume that matches one of my friends costumes. So anyways Friday night it took me about 2 to 3 hours to do my homework which is pretty unusual. Thank gawd I didn't end up going out since I wouldn't have gotten my homework done until about 2 in the morning (Dallas invited me out to some fashion show party at a bar but I was not going to go since we had to be up early for the drive out to San Bernadino, CA.) I didn't even end up going to sleep until about 2 anyways since I was super excited...I ended up having to take a sleeping pill. I also woke up because I forgot to grab my ticket for Nocturnal which I grabbed and put on top of my purse. The drive there wasn't all that bad. Dallas and I ended up bickering a little bit but I think that's because we were just tired.

SB was sooo hot. I was not happy at all about going to the festival when it was still sunny outside and 106 degrees. The costume that I bought did not look good on me at all (I'm thinking it was the McDonalds Dallas and I ate that morning for breakfest...the only good thing about waking up early is McDonalds breakfest.) Thank gawd I brought other costumes with me (I brought them with me so my friend Alisha could wear one for the festival though she didn't wear any.) I ended up wearing the black dress that I wore for the second day of EDC last year. My hair was also not cooperating at all. I bought a bunch of Glowbys (they are light strings that you put in your hair) but I only ended up wearing one. My makeup was also not going on right probably because it was about 90 degrees in the hotel room and I kept sweating it off. So really nothing was going right for me at all. I was pretty tempted not to go to the festival at all and I figured that with all the things that were going on it God's way of telling me not to go. Now the real kicker was when I found out that I had left my ticket at home.

Unfortunately I ended up having to pay for a general admission ticket ($80) and then upgrade it to a VIP ticket (another $100) so altogether I ended up spending at least $315 just to get into Nocturnal. The line to get into the festival would have taken us about 1 1/2 to get through but thankfully my friend Rob was eavesdropping on someones conversation and found out that there was a line for out of state id's. At about 11 at night I ended up getting really, really sick. Searching for a taxi to take me back to the hotel was a pain in the butt. I kept on walking up and down the street because I couldn't find one...though I also couldn't see anything. The taxi driver did not know the address to my hotel so I had to call 411 to get the address (thank gawd my phone even worked since generally no calls go through at festivals like that.)

I woke up at about 6 the next morning and rode back with my friends Alisha and Cindy. I'm pretty happy that I woke up that early since Dallas was going with Rob to visit his family and I would have been stuck driving by myself (Alisha and all them ended up leaving around 7:30ish.) I think this is my last year going to Nocturnal. Last year was bad (I had a panic attack in the middle of a line to get on this carnival ride) and this year was almost as bad as last year.

I have dance class today...actually two of them. Today lessons are a Bollywood dance class and a stretching class. BTW, I didn't use any of the dance moves I learned in my private gogo dance lessons at Nocturnal. Honestly though there were some good things about Nocturnal...the music was fantastic! Probably the best I've ever heard.

Love Bug looks so cute right now and smells super good (she was getting kind of stinky since I couldn't bathe her because of her surgery.) I boarded her when I went out of town this last weekend. I absolutely love the place that I board her. They are so great with her. They even take pictures of the dogs playing around during doggie day care. I was kind of sad though because on the ride back home after I picked her up she seemed super depressed...though I did pull her out of day care so she probably just missed her new friends. She perked up though when we actually got home.

Oh and apparently I'm failing my English class. I'm sure it's a mistake though since last time I checked (which was about a week ago) I was making a B+...one point away from an A-. I'm still making an A in my math class though. I'm telling you for whatever reason my brain has switched from liking English and having a really hard time in math to having a really hard time in English and a super easy time in math (though to be honest I really don't have a "hard" time doing English...it's just kind of boring and slow.)

I'm going to try to start answering my private messages every Wednesday. I missed last week just because I was super busy. Remember tomorrow I have a webcam show at 3:00PM.
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Old 10-01-2010, 05:07 AM   #132
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Sept. 30, 2010
So I will be shooting content for my site on Saturday the 2nd. I am going to aim for 2 video and photo sets. I will probably do a dressy shoot in my black and white Bebe dress (that is if I'm able to pull it down to expose my boobs) and I'll probably do a casual shoot in my blue Victoria's Secret lounge pants and orange VS tank top. As soon as I get my Anne Boleyn costume in I will be shooting in that for my Halloween update. I should be getting the dress sometime next week and the jewelry and crown should be here the 3rd week of October. I just recieved the girdle today. It's quite pretty! We will definitely have to find someplace special to shoot in that outfit.

I'm thinking about getting this costume for the Scottsdale Halloween block party on Saturday, October 30th (I'm wearing the Anne Boleyn costume to the Wrigley Mansion Halloween party on Friday the 29th). Unfortunately there is no way I would be able to wear the Anne Boleyn costume to a club in Scottsdale. It's going to be way too crowded and the last thing I need is to have someone spill something on the dress.
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Old 10-01-2010, 06:13 PM   #133
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Oct. 1, 2010
I just put up my 100th professional video. Pretty crazy! It seems like time is just flying by since I've gotten in the industry. I had the strangest dream last night. FTVRob and FTVAaron (the FTVGirls recruiter) was in it and one of my members was in it too but I can't remember exactly who it was (it obviously someone I've either met or seen in pictures/video). Webcam show today at 3PM. Before then I need to get a manicure for tomorrow's shoot. I am also going to answer my private messages today since I forgot to do them until now.

The Thanksgiving update outfit I found is super cute. It even comes with a cute headress. I'm probably going to have Love Bug in part of the shoot to since I found a super cute outfit for her to wear (you guys will definitely get a kick out of it.) At some point I am also going to have to do a home tour shoot...not sure why I've been putting it off all this time. I think I was just waiting until I had absolutely everything I needed in the house (ie pictures, furniture, etc.). Only problem is now I need another bookcase since I have probably over 50 books sitting on the floor in front of the bookcase since there is no room for them.
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Old 10-05-2010, 07:43 PM   #134
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Oct. 5, 2010
I am going to the doctor tomorrow to make sure that I don't have any serious problems going on with my stomach. Sunday morning I started feeling pretty bad. I couldn't keep any food down. Monday I started getting these awful pains in the left upper side of my abdomen. I have a pretty high pain tolerance but this was even a bit much for me to handle. The pains are still going on today. My mom told me that I need to either go to my internal medicine doctor or to urgent care...I would much rather go to my doctor than have to wait forever in urgent care. I really hope it's nothing serious. It sucks though since the appointment is so early in the morning, though I woke up today pretty early because of the stomach pains so I'm sure it will wake me up again pretty early.
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Old 10-11-2010, 06:56 AM   #135
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Oct. 10, 2010
Today was interesting to say the least. I was supposed to shoot with FTVGirls Madeline but lets just say something happened that upset me pretty bad and caused me to not be interested at all in shooting. It sucked to because I spent about 1 1/2 hours having my hair and makeup done for the shoot. I definitely would like to get my hair and makeup done again for my next shoot and am thinking about getting it done for Halloween. Going to get my annual womanly exam done tomorrow and going to get tested for STD's. I'm a big believer in testing every 6 months even if you are in a commited relationship since people tend to stray. I just finished 4 video logs (still have 1 left to finish off the month.) I love it when I don't have to do multiple retakes and when the answers come easy to me (doesn't happen to often though.) The webcam show the other day was interesting. There were only 2 of the usual people there and a bunch of other random members I've never heard of before. They were getting kind of rowdy...definitely not what I'm used to at all. But it turned out pretty well. Ended up orgasming at least 4 times and used an anal toy. I went to the Tilted Kilt bar to watch the Cardinals game with my friends. I'm not all that into football but it's fun hanging out with your friends during a game especially when they are all gung ho about it (their energy ends up rubbing off on you.)
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Old 10-27-2010, 07:59 AM   #136
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Oct. 27, 2010
Well I was doing really well there updating my journal at least once a week. I guess things have just been pretty busy lately. Last time I updated my journal was on the 10th so since then I've gone to Octoberfest in Big Bear, shot in my Anne Boleyn costume and gone to Monster Massive in LA.

I'm probably not going to be going to Big Bear for Octoberfest again. We had to wake up pretty early to get to Big Bear by 3. The drive up there was scary. We were driving in my friend Mike's huge SUV and I couldn't stop thinking about how the vehicle was going to flip over (especially when we were driving up the mountain). I ended up having a full blown panic attack during the drive. The cabin we stayed in was absolutely gorgeous. Three stories, six bedroom. There was two pianos, a pool table and two jacuzzis. We had 11 people at the cabin this year. The first night was pretty crazy. I ended up drinking a whole bottle of port wine (which has a 20% alcohol content). At some point I was cuddling with a metal rooster (not sure why, but I was very attached to that rooster).



I was pretty much the first one to pass out both nights. The Octoberfest celebration itself was awesome. I swung for this Burgermeister package which included dinner, a beer, a beer stein (which I left at Dallas' and haven't picked up yet), and a little medalion necklace. They had a little petting zoo with farm animals that I went in. I got to pick up and cuddle the cutest little goat. I also got the girls to get their faces painted. The highlight of the night though was when I went riding on the mechanical bull. I've got to say I did pretty well. I got a video of it which I will put up sometime soon. Not sure how long I stayed on since they didn't have a timer but it was for a pretty long time. I ended up getting off because the rope was breaking open the skin on my finger (I didn't wear a glove). It's still not completely healed. We didn't stay too long at the festival mainly because everyone had been day drinking and were also worn out from the night before. Dallas and I ended up just snuggling together and watched episode after episode of Jersey Shore while everyone else continued partying. The drive home wasn't too much fun. I got in a huge fight (over politics) with my friend Mike's girlfriend Megan (she didn't even know what party Obama belonged to), so I switched places with one of my other friend, Tarna, who was driving with my friend Ryan (apparently they had also been fighting). I was definitely happy to finally get home that night...I missed my books.



My Anne Boleyn costume looks fantastic. It feels like the fabric on the shoulders is a tad loose but it still looks great. The jewelry (especially the tiara) is definitely my favorite part of the costume. I shot in it last week at FTVChris' place. I haven't yet got the photo/video from Rob so unfortunately that update is late. I'm hoping to get it tomorrow and put it up after I edit it. Wearing it on Saturday is going to be interesting. I think all of my friends are going to a block party in old town Scottsdale and the dress isn't really meant for that type of place. The hoop skirt makes the skirt flare out at least a foot around me. Thankfully it isn't stiff and should be able to fit through anything. I'm just also kind of scared about someone spilling something on me or accidently burning my dress with a cigarette. Some of my friends are talking about taking a trip to Las Vegas either Thursday night or Friday day and coming back on Saturday. I think it will be a ton of fun I just have to be back in time to get my hair and makeup done on Saturday (I'm probably going to have to reschedule my appointment for later in the evening). I bought a Princess Peach/Toadstool costume to go with my friend's Mario and Luigi costume. I'm really excited to get that though I think the skirt is super short. This is going to be Carter's first year trick or treating. He has the most adorable Monsters Inc. costume.



Monster Massive was soooo much fun and I definitely plan on doing it again next year. I barely got any sleep the night before since I was so excited. I was driving with my friends Alisha, Katie and Andrew (we took Andrew's car and he drove). We were supposed to leave at 9 so we could get to the hotel around 3ish but we didn't leave until 9:30 (and I even showed up at 8:30 so we could leave on time). We were all pretty tired on the drive out there but perked up as soon as we got to the hotel. It was pretty amusing to because everyone (Dallas and Rob, Jaqueline, Adrian, Garrett, and Linsday) also ended up showing up at the exact same time as we did...totally not planned. Alisha was supposed to wear a Rikku costume but her costume didn't come in time so Andrew was the only other person wearing a Final Fantasy costume (Tidus). He looked pretty funny in it too since he has dark hair and wore a bright yellow spiky wig. About 5 or 6 people knew who I was dressed as so that was pretty sweet. Surprisingly I ended up hanging out with Katie and her friends Ben, Rolando, and Ren more than I did the rest of the group (totally unusual since I normally don't venture away from Dallas). I talked to two guys dressed up as Harold and Kumar (from the second movie) about my job and FTVGirls. One of the guys actually just signed up on my forum to which is totally cool. What was great about MM was that there was the perfect amount of people there. It wasn't too crowded like the massives normally are. After MM we drove to Hollywood to hang out at Avalon for afterhours. When we got to the front of the line (a 20 minute wait...I even saw the bouncer get bribed so that they could get in faster, the first time I've ever seen that in real life) we found out it was $30 a person which none of us really wanted to pay so we went back to the boy's hotel room (a really creepy, hostel like hotel) where everyone else met us. Katie and all of us ended up falling asleep (I like a group that likes their sleep) until the rest of the group came to the hotel then Katie and all them took off for some other afterparty while the boys and I just slept. The next day Alisha, Katie, and Andrew were not in the most pleasant mood since they hadn't slept at all. I did not want to drive with a group of people that were grouchy and hadn't slept (which is probably a good thing since apparently Andrew and Alisha were fighting on the way home) so I drove with the boys which was surprisingly fun. We talked pretty much the whole way home and the drive felt way quicker than it normally does.



Tomorrow night I am going to the second annual pumpkin carving party my group has. This time we are having it at my friend Ryan's house. I kind of want to bring Love Bug since Ryan has a dog...but then again I don't want LB to get into anything (since we are carving the pumpkins on the floor there is going to be pumpkin seeds everywhere). Afterwards we are going to 910 Live. I'm not sure who is playing but they seem to get some pretty awesome dj's to perform. Apparently 910 is the new Cream where my group used to hang out on Wednesday nights to listen to EDM (electronic dance music).

BTW I made a new free picture section for webcam/cell phone pics. First one has been put up. PICTURE SET.

11:58 AM
One of my grandma's died. This is awful.
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Old 11-07-2010, 07:51 PM   #137
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Nov. 7, 2010
I was talking to my friend about their mourning style the other day. I always thought my mourning style was kind of abnormal. I've had three people that I know die (my dad, my ex-boyfriend, and my grandma). All three times I've mourned the same way. I tend to ignore the fact that someone has died. Well maybe ignore is the wrong word. Death doesn't seem to affect me that much. Maybe it's because I know they are going someplace better. To me death isn't so much the end since I know later on I will be seeing them again. I know that when my mom dies I will have a complete meltdown. I try not to think about death to much because honestly it scares me...to death...pardon the pun .

The Anne Boleyn costume did not get used this year (well at least for Halloween it didn't). I did go on a trip to Vegas with some of my guy friends (which was a little interesting since I was the only girl there.) We had a ton of fun and the guys were complete gentlemen. We stayed at the Stratosphere (the first and last time I stay there). We got in town at about 11 at night. As soon as we got ready we went out on the town. All of us (at least the people from AZ...we met up with friends from Texas) listen to EDM so we were on a mission to find a club that played EDM. I know that Rain in the Palms plays EDM (at least it did the times I've been there) so we went to the Palms. Unfortunately Rain was closed so we decided to go to Moon. I never noticed that the whole dance floor in Moon is open to the sky. It was pretty amazing. Also they have a whole outside area where you can see all of Las Vegas. The club was awesome...hardly any people there, but the music was awful (they were playing rap and hip/hop...and not even hip/hop that I will listen to). After Moon the group went to Drai's for after hours. After about an hour in Drai's my friend and I took off back for the hotel. The whole next day we slept until it got dark (there really isn't anything to do in Vegas during the day in my opinion). That night we dressed up in our costumes. The guys were supposed to be Mario and Luigi but unfortunately the costume website sent them matching Luigi costumes. I went as Princess Toadstool. I wasn't too happy about my costume since when I bought it I thought it covered my whole midsection. False advertising! The top was sooo small (it made my boobs look huge though). It only came down to my natural waist line (maybe a little below it) so I had a few inches of midsection showing. Honestly I don't really like showing a ton of skin in public...and that was a lot for me. I couldn't wear the petticoat underneath the skirt because then half my butt would show. I also couldn't figure out how to keep the tiara on my head (it was made out of fabric and probably needed to be connected to a headband). I was pretty uncomfortable in the costume to be perfectly honest and wasn't wanting to go out (I also didn't eat that day since I wanted to be as skinny as possible).

The camera pic is pretty blurry


We went to Tao in the Venetian. I think I've been there once before. I will not go there again. The place was sooo crowded. We stood in line for about 30 minutes just to get in. I was in there for about 5 minutes before I decided to leave. I do not like crowds. I don't like having to squeeze my way through hundreds of people. The only other time I've been that crowded was at Nocturnal '09 when I was waiting in line to get on that mechanical swing ride and I ended up having a panic attack. Luckily one of my guy friends wasn't too thrilled about all the people either so we decided to leave and go back to the hotel where we pigged out on room service and watched movies.

The next day (well night) I was supposed to go to the Ghost Ball at Axis/Radius with my friends but I ended up crashing out at 6PM and didn't wake up until the next day. I was pretty disappointed that I didn't wear my A.B. costume but then again I can always wear it next year. Sunday night I went to my parent's home. We were going to take my little nephew trick or treating (his first time doing that). He looked so cute in his little Monster's Inc. costume. He absolutely hated the hood though. It was my first year handing out candy to the little trick or treaters. I had to make a quick trip to buy more candy too since there were more trick or treaters than my mom originally thought there would be. I had a blast though handing out the candy. I saw the cutest little girl in the cutest costume. She must have been about 2 or 3 with little pigtails and glasses that magnified her eyes (that's probably similar to what my eyes used to look like when I was a little girl wearing glasses). She had on a ladybug outfit with these adorable little shoes that squeaked when she walked.

I can't figure out what time zone Arizona is in right now. I've looked it up and some sites say MST and other sites say it could be MST or PST. DST is annoying! I would hate to actually have to change the clocks for it (one of the many positive of living in AZ...no DST). I have a ton of clocks in the house and I am super anal about them being at the exact right time.

My doctor sucks btw. I think I am going to find a new one. It took forever for the doctor to get back to me and I think she probably would've taken even longer if I hadn't called them to ask about the results. So apparently everything looked fine. All the blood tests came back normal which I am very happy about.
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Old 12-03-2010, 06:09 PM   #138
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Dec. 3, 2010
Sorry that it's taken me so long to write another journal entry. Honestly nothing much has been going on. Thanksgiving was great. I found out that pecan pie is one of the worst holiday foods you can eat...but I love pecan pie so whatever. I was supposed to be over at my parent's house at noon (we were going to eat early) but apparently the turkey didn't thaw all the way so we had to wait until 4 before we ate. Love Bug came with me...I dressed her up in her little turkey costume. We watched some of our home movies from when we were still living in Germany. It was pretty interesting seeing what I was like back then. My sister and brother were adorable! Later on I went to my friend Andrew's house. He had friends over for Thanksgiving (mostly people that don't have family in AZ). A few of us went to this bar/club called Chaser's for their house night. The music was so so, so we only stayed there for an hour and a half or so then went to our friend Tom's house. I didn't end up getting home until 4 in the morning (though thankfully at least I wasn't out until the sun rose...hate that).

Other than Thanksgiving nothing really interesting has been going on. I did a shoot the other weekend with the new photographer. He's getting really good. I loved the pictures he took. We shot three video updates and two photo updates (one of the video and part of one of the photo updates was public). Finals are next week. I'm really going to have buckle down and study hard next week. My grandma gets into town in a couple weeks too. My mom has a bunch of things planned for us to do. We are having a girl's day were we go and get our nails done and go to Postino's (one of my favorite restaraunts). I will be taking my grandma and sister to see the Nutcracker and we will probably eat downtown somewhere. We are also doing a cookie baking night (that is always a lot of fun to do). One of the nights we will be going to Zoolights at the Phoenix Zoo. We've done that pretty much every year since I was 16 or 17. We are also going to go up to Flagstaff (it should be Carter's first time seeing snow) for the weekend. Hopefully I can bring my dog because otherwise I will have to board her and I would love for her to see snow too.

For New Years I will be going to Oregon with a friend. Should be interesting since it will be super cold up there. I haven't told Dallas yet...she will probably be disappointed though honestly we haven't been talking all that much recently and haven't seen each other in a pretty long time. She's getting pretty serious with her boyfriend so she spends most of her time with him. I'm probably not going to do a New Years shoot...honestly I haven't decided yet. If I do I will wear the dress I wore for New Years last year. I wanted to do a retro 50's theme shoot for my Christmas update this year but some of the items I needed were out of stock so I decided to get another dress (that isn't retro...actually it's pretty modern) instead.

Tonight I am going to this rave called Hard Dance Nation. I love hardstyle so it should be a ton of fun. Tomorrow I was thinking about going to the Tempe Festival of Arts. I've never been to it before. Hopefully I can find some more fairy items for my house. Sunday I am going to one of my favorite restaraunts, Fogo de Chao. It's a Brazilian steakhouse. They have some of the best meats on Earth and their salad bar is to die for. I won't be able to eat all day since I will need to come there very hungry (there is sooo much food).
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Old 12-08-2010, 07:30 PM   #139
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Dec. 8, 2010
If you haven't noticed I had to reschedule the webcam show to next week. Not sure what I was thinking since this is finals week and I need to be studying super hard. Kind of freaked out right now about finals to be honest. I always get like this before tests...were I feel like I haven't prepared myself enough or I feel super busy and/or rushed. I also wish that finals didn't have to be during the month of December when everything seems so hectic anyways.

Quite a few of my friends go to the Conservatory here in Tempe (it's the best school in the country for recording arts). So a couple nights this week I've gotten to hang around the studios there and watch my friends record various things (one night it was electronic music, another night it was a folksy sounding song). It's pretty interesting seeing how they go about recording music. It's a ton of work and honestly seems kind of tedious.

Tonight I do plan on going out just for a while since I haven't really gotten to hang out with all of my friends in what seems like a long time (I haven't seen Dallas in a couple weeks now I think). I'm pretty excited too because one of my favorite dj's (Skrillex) is playing tonight at 910. This will be the first time I've ever seen him live. I think he is pretty new to the electronic scene and his music is incredibly different than most of the electronic music out there. Actually to be honest I can't even really figure out what subgenre he would fit into (something like electro probably).

You guys would be so proud of me. I've been eating super healthy lately and haven't really eaten out too much (though I did cave last night after the recording session and had Waffle House with my friends). My fridge is stocked with healthy, mostly organic food. There is pretty much no starch or sugar in my kitchen. And I've been finally really learning to cook. I bought three awesome cookbooks that teach me how to cook low cal, low fat meals and snacks. I also planned out my weeks meals in advanced (that is something my mom does too). It's fun cooking meals...surprisingly I haven't really messed anything up. The cleanup afterwards is a pain in the butt especially since I seem to have to get every dish dirty. My one concern though is that with all the food that is in the fridge (mostly produce) I think that it will probably go bad before I can eat it all. Unfortunately the produce that I am buying is pretty expensive since it is all organic.
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Old 12-12-2010, 08:09 PM   #140
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Dec. 12, 2010
Well the laptop that I normally use for...well everything is completely screwed up. It won't stop freezing on me about 5 to 10 minutes after it's been turned on. I am going to hire a computer repair person to come over and fix both laptops and somehow make it so I can use the internet on the pc. I am also going to try to have all of my editing programs put on all the computers just in case something happens. If I can get pretty much all my website content off my laptop and onto the pc I will be very happy since it seems to slow it down so much. That way I can use this laptop (the old laptop) as my gaming laptop (that's what it was bought for), the newer laptop will be used for school and whatever else I would need it for other than editing and the pc will be used for editing. Honestly though I would be absolutely thrilled if we could get this all figured out and fixed by Tuesday at the latest since I A) can't update the website since all my content is on the other laptop and B) can't really use the webcam (I have a webcam show on Wednesday) since I don't have access to the webcam page on here. I definitely need the person to do on site computer repair since I absolutely do not trust anyone around my computers. I've heard horror stories about computer repair people going into your computers and looking at things on there.

I babysat my nephew yesterday night while my parent's went out to Glendale for a "night on the town". It's been so long since they have had a chance to relax and enjoy themselves so I was totally happy to take care of baby Carter (he was an absolute doll and watched a bunch of episodes of Arrested Developement with me...one of my new...and only favorite shows). I also went to Dave and Buster's. It was a ton of fun as usual. The past two times I've gone I've donated the points I've won to go towards gifts to Phoenix Children's Hospital (it's normally the smartest thing to do since I do not need stuffed animals or random little toys).

I need to go to Whole Foods and pick up some steaks for the next few days since I am going on a protein and veggie 3 or 4 day diet. My face has started breaking out a tad bit (most people laugh when I say it's breaking out because breaking out to me is like one tiny pimple) so I'm going to try cutting out sugars for a bit to see if that helps.
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Old 01-14-2011, 03:54 PM   #141
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Jan. 13, 2011
If any of you have had problems with the v107 videos ("Lost and Found Orgasms Pt.2") I just fixed it. I forgot to rename the video file names after I uploaded them.

So it's been a long time since I've updated my journal. I just got back from my vacation in Puerto Vallarta. I'm itchy from all the darn mosquito bites I got there (I put on some anti itch creme which seems to help a little bit) and I am sunburned (though the sunburn is turning into a tan on my arms). I got to fly private (one of my girlfriends is dating some guy that is super wealthy). It was soooo cool being in the cockpit. I got to sit up there for most of the way there. I'm surprised how comfortable I was flying on a small plane (normally I freak out on planes). I think I wasn't so scared because I could see everything that was going on. The pilot did a couple tricks with the plane that freaked my girlfriends out (I thought it was hillarious!). We got lost pretty much every time we went outside. The villa we stayed at was absolutely stunning. It had five bedrooms and 5 1/2 bathrooms. I picked the bedroom that had purple pillows. The view from my room was stunning (actually the view from every room was stunning). We were on a mountain so you could see the ocean for miles and miles and we also had jungle views. The house came with a maid, a cook, and some guy that helped out with pretty much everything (he brought us drinks, helped us make reservations, etc.). The first day we got there we didn't really do too much. My friend Lyn was obsessed with going into the hot tub but unfortunately it didn't get hot the whole time. One night Lyn decided she was going to fill it up with hot, boiling water...which didn't work at all but was incredibly funny to watch. The second day we were there we had masseuses come over to the villa. I got a facial, a body scrub and a 90 minute hot stone massage. I was worried that I would smell like the body scrub that I got which smelled like cleaning products but thankfully it washed right off. The third day we went on an atv tour through the city and mountains. I didn't think to bring a bandana and sunglasses so I kept getting sand and dirt in my eyes and on my face. We stopped at this little bar that was right in the middle of the jungle. Since there was no one there Lyn and I went skinny dipping in this river. Lyn is so funny...we asked how cold the water was and she told us that it was pretty comfortable...liar! I got in there and froze my butt off. Of course later on I found out it was a mountain fed river. A ton of people ended up showing up 5 minutes after we got out and got dressed. We then rode over to a zipline tour. I've been ziplining before but didn't this one required a lot more hiking than the last one I did in Jamaica. Lyn even went upside down on the last zipline. We left on Wednesday (though we wanted to stay an extra day...we couldn't since the pilot had to be somewhere on Thursday). I would love to visit Puerto Vallarta again though I would do a lot more activities if I did. Apparently Lyn and Theresa travel a lot...they were talking about going to the Virgin Islands next. Hopefully they do it when I don't have school.

I just looked at the pictures from the last shoot that I did (last Saturday). They are awesome. I am incredibly happy with how they turned out and I think you guys will love the updates. They were all done in public. I did a school girl shoot in a park/school were I did a stocking stuffing. I also did a sexy dress masturbation shoot at an office building. The other shoot I did was a white dress shoot in glasses and knee high boots. That one was a dildo play scene.

Christmas was pretty hectic. My grandma (my mom's mom) came in from Texas for a couple weeks. My mom had something planned for us to do pretty much every night that she was there. At first I was pretty excited about grandma being here but after a couple of days traveling back and forth and spending hours with my family I was kind of over it. I got some cool presents Christmas day. My dad got me my favorite gift...this beautiful snow globe with a fairy inside it. The next day we all went to Flagstaff for a couple days. I brought Love Bug with me. I wasn't too sure how she was going to do in the snow but she was awesome...just jumped right into it and was prancing around. We didn't do too much in Flagstaff...the second day my dad, my sister and I went snowboarding. I bought my sister a super cute boarding outfit while we were up there. I did surprisingly well. The only time I fell down was when I got off the ski lift and when I purposely fell down. My dad was awesome! Apparently he hadn't boarded in like 5 years but he totally looked like a pro. My sister didn't do too well. It was her first time boarding...she's moving up to Alaska next month so she said she is going to try learning up there.

I left for Oregon on Wednesday the 29th (pretty much the day after we got back to Phoenix). My friends told me to bring warm clothes but I must have been tired when I packed because none of the clothes I brought were super warm. I remember looking around the baggage claim and seeing everyone dressed in dark, warm jackets and scarves (that should've been my first clue that I wasn't dressed appropriately for the weather). I on the other hand was wearing my light blue VS lounge pants with my orange VS tank top with a thin white jacket over it...yeah I was cold! We went to downtown Portland to get something to eat but before we ate I had us stop by Macy's so I could get a scarf, hat, and gloves. At the restaraunt I tried duck which I didn't care for at all since it tasted slightly gamey (I hate gamey tasting meats). I actually stayed in Corvallis which is about an hour and a half from Portland. We stayed in my friends family friends home (it reminded me of the homes in Winona, TX where I used to live). We didn't do too much while we were there, mainly just walked around (the town and the college campus). They drink a ton of coffee up there so we ended up doing the same. Apparently caffeine doesn't affect me like it used to since I didn't get wired on it and was able to fall asleep pretty easy on it. We didn't have anything planned for New Years eve (I didn't even bring a dress to wear for that night). The night before we decided to go to downtown Portland since my friend's friend was DJing at some club/bar. The hotel we stayed at was right on the river and not too far from downtown where we spent most of our time. Since we didn't have anything to wear for that evening we went to Macy's again. We didn't end up getting anything since I couldn't find anything that I liked (which was a good thing in the end since none of my friends friends were dressed up). There is a big difference between the clubs in Scottsdale and the club/bar in Portland we went to. It was interesting to see how none of the people were super dressed up. I guess appearances don't matter all that much there (at least compared to stuck up Scottsdale). It seemed like most of the people there went to the club/bar just to have fun...not so much to pick up on chicks/guys. The music they were playing was pretty iffy. They were playing a lot of rap, hip/hop, and top 40's. Some of it was okay. Every once in a while they would play some EDM (electronic dance music). I guess EDM isn't too big in Portland since almost every time they would play it everyone would kind of stop dancing (while I on the other hand would get up and start dancing). The town the next day was completely dead so we didn't get to do too much. I could totally see myself living there. I enjoy the rain and cloudy weather so that wouldn't be a problem (though it was sunny pretty much the whole time I was there).

School starts on Tuesday. I'm not too excited about it. My schedule isn't too bad though...I only have school noon to 4, Monday to Thursday. Today is my nephews birthday. I have to run to Toys R' Us and buy him his gift. I really don't want to have to drive all the way out to my parent's house. I've been traveling so much that really all I want to do is just lay around and sleep (though at this point I've probably already caught up on sleep).

9:32 PM
My two year anniversary for the website passed (sometime in December). Thinking about how things have progressed and how much the site has grown is astonishing to me. For all of you who have been with me since the beginning and all of you have recently joined...thank you.
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Old 01-25-2011, 08:15 PM   #142
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Jan. 25, 2011
I am trying to find a home to rent for my friends and I for Coachella. People must rent the homes way in advance because everything is completely booked. We had this same problem last year but luckily were able to get a home because someone backed out. I think we are going to have a lot more people going this year. I've had at least 6 of my friends saying that they are going to attend. The lineup for Coachella is awesome. I would like to see Sasha, Afrojack (this is a must see for me), Sander Kleinenburg, Skrillex (another must see), Paul Van Dyk, Fedde Le Grande, Laidback Luke, Chuckie, and Duran Duran. Most of the bands/dj's I want to see will most likely be in the same tent so luckily we won't have to wander around everywhere to see the dj's we want to see. I'm not sure how we are going to manage seeing the bands on Friday since we are most likely going to be driving up there on Friday. I think we are probably going to leave on Sunday too so we probably won't be going to Coachella that day.

I visited Austin this weekend. I had a pretty good time though I didn't do much. As usual I brought the wrong clothes with me so I was pretty cold throughout the weekend. Saturday night we went to 6th street to this bar called Seven Red. I've never really seen a bar like it before. I didn't particularly care for the music but watching the bands perform was highly entertaining.

School is going well. I love my English class and my history class seems like it should be pretty easy. The teacher mainly lectures the whole time and I think the only homework we have is just reading chapters out of the book. I dropped my math and psychology class. I will be taking those two classes next semester. I plan on taking the CLEP exam on a few different courses that way I can get some more credits for this semester.
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Old 01-31-2011, 09:17 PM   #143
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Jan. 31, 2011
F'ing spammers! I hate spammers. I mean seriously way to waste your life you stupid spammers. I just had to ban a bunch of people and delete a bunch of threads because they were all spam(mers). Lameness. Going to Best Buy to exchange my headset since it's not wireless and then need to go grocery shopping since I have absolutely no food in my house and have been eating out all last week. I also need to buy my Valentine's lingerie and toy for my Vday update.

I'm sorry for missing my webcam show too. I don't know what the heck I was thinking since I scheduled it during one of my classes.
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Old 02-09-2011, 02:35 AM   #144
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Feb. 8th, 2010
One of my fans sent me this link. I recently got a new phone (HTC Evo 4G...stupid to have a 4G phone when we don't even have a 4G network in AZ yet) which I absolutely love...but the word autocorrect is a pain in the butt. I also don't really like how the pictures come out on the phone...the flash on it is incredibly bright.
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Old 02-25-2011, 05:14 PM   #145
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Feb. 25, 2011
Good Lord I slept a lot last night (went to sleep at 9pm and woke up at 10am). I think I needed it though since I haven't caught up on sleep in forever (mostly because of my Vegas trip).

So Vegas was a lot of fun. I drove up with two of my friends on Friday. We were supposed to leave at 10am but didn't end up leaving until 11am. I had to drop off LB at my mom's house so that was another 45 minutes slightly out of the way. We got stuck in 2 1/2 hour stand still traffic on the I-93 because of an accident. My phone didn't work so I couldn't even play on the internet or anything. We were surprisingly patient during that 2 1/2 hours. My friends and I stayed at the Tropicana. The room wasn't too bad....it was actually quite spacious. The only thing I didn't like was that it got incredibly humid in the room occasionally. I don't know if it's a common thing for hotels to do now but if you have more than two people staying in a room they charge you more money. I really don't understand that since we stayed in a room that could fit 4 people. My friend Jessica had a promoter friend that she thought was going to "hook us up" for a couple clubs. We started off at this one lounge club called Blush. It wasn't too bad to be honest. The only thing I didn't like was the music. We thought that there was going to be a hosted bar (free alcohol) but apparently that was only for girls and didn't start until 11pm (we ordered a drink 4 minutes before and didn't find out about the 11pm rule so ended up having to pay $30). I really wasn't in the mood to drink so I only had a glass of champagne. We left Blush and went to this one club called Surrender. Jessica and I got in free but our friend Ryan had to pay a $40 cover fee which again irritated them since they thought that the promoter was going to "hook us up". It was pretty much a waste of $40 since we only stayed there for about 10 minutes. I loved the club though. They had a bunch of gogo dancers and it was very spacious. I was pretty surprised about how many girls were in the clubs. Usually the guy to girl ratio is like 70:30 but it was almost 50:50 everywhere we went. We met up with some of our friends at Tao (I hate that club). Again we really only stayed there for about 10 or 15 minutes. I was irritated as heck because it was so crowded (that's the main reason I don't like that place). My friend Jessica almost got in a fight with some girl that started pushing her for no reason. As we were walking out some random guy grabbed my butt. At that point I was so irritated that I was ready to slap him but fortunately for him he took off and I couldn't find him.

Jessica was sick the whole morning and part of the afternoon since she drank so much the night before. We didn't really do much besides eat and hang out with Dallas and her boyfriend Rob. We took a short nap because we knew that some of our more energetic friends were going to be coming in soon and that we probably wouldn't get any sleep until we got home the next day. There was a huge group of my friends going to the Marquee to see Above and Beyond. Our friend told us we had to get there at 8:30 at the latest so we could actually get in. Luckily we did get in and didn't even have to wait in line since we had bought our tickets pre sale. My friend Rob wasn't in a good mood at all because one of the door men made him buy new shoes that cost $280 (he was wearing nice white shoes that would've been perfectly fine in any other club...we just think the door man was being mean). The drinks were incredibly expensive. Dallas bought two double drinks that cost $55. I didn't want to drink at all since I didn't want to be hung over the next day driving back to Phoenix. Everyone was irritated because they were playing top 40's and hip/hop (though mainly hip/hop) right before a trance concert. The club was completely crowded. I really do think that they were way over capacity...it was actually kind of scary how crowded it was. Above and Beyond didn't even get on until 1:30...they were supposed to start at 1pm. I ended up leaving at about 3 since I wasn't in the mood to deal with pushy people anymore (plus I needed to get sleep since I was driving home). The Cosmopolitan where the Marquee is at is a beautiful hotel. I definitely need to stay there sometime. Most of my friends "out partied" Vegas. Apparently they stayed out till all the after hours clubs were closed.

The drive home wasn't bad at all. Jessica, Ryan, and Austin slept almost the whole way home. I almost fell asleep on the road a few times. I didn't want to have anyone else drive since A) it's my car and I don't really trust other people driving my car and B) they were all sleep deprived.

Valentine's day was really nice this year. A whole group of us had a pot luck at my friend Andrew's house. I brought chicken alfredo and an apple cobbler. It was a very laid back Valentine's day which I actually really enjoyed.

Spring break is coming up here pretty soon. Some of my friends are going to Lake Havasu for it. I'm not a big fan of hanging out on boats all day in the sun but it will be something different so I will most likely go. I need to start getting out in the sun a bit before Havasu so I can get used to it and hopefully not get sun stroke and/or bad sunburns like I normally do. I've never been to Havasu but everyone says it's a lot of fun.

I just bought a gym membership to LA Fitness yesterday. I've been eating healthier too. I want to get in pretty good shape by my 23rd birthday in May. I think I can do it if I go on a diet that consists of mainly protein and veggies. My friend who is a personal trainer is going to help me out with that. He told me I need to start doing 30 minutes of cardio right when I wake up and then eating right after that. I also need to start eating smaller meals 4 or 5 times a day. I normally stop eating at about 9pm so I don't really have a problem with that. He told me I need to be doing cardio about 5 or 6 times a week (preferably 6) and then weights 3 or 4 times a week. Weights are pretty easy for me and I don't mind doing it at all...it's cardio that I have a problem with. I have really bad exercise induced asthma and that really affects me doing cardio. I have an inhaler and that seems to help a bit. But to be honest it could also be my fault since when I do cardio I really push my limits.

Love Bug's 1st birthday was last month on the 18th. I feel bad that I forgot about it...I probably would've made her a doggie cake or something. I realized today that I've been in the adult industry for 3 years now. My first porn shoot was up on the internet in March 2008. It amazes me how time just flies by without you noticing. It also feels like as I get older time passes by even quicker. I am incredibly scared of getting older. I used to be the baby of the group but my friend Jessica recently came into the group and took that title from me (she's only 21). I want to experience as much as I possibly can before I get to old or before I don't have time because of school. I have friends that are in their 40's and 50's and still go out to the clubs but I figure I probably won't be able to do things like that since I will be too busy with work. Plus by that time I hope I will be married and have children.
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Old 03-15-2011, 06:56 PM   #146
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Mar. 15, 2011
Nothing much has been going on. It's spring break right now which I am really happy about. I don't really have any plans. I was supposed to go to Beyond Wonderland in San Bernadino, CA but decided not to. I am editing my videos and photos from my last shoot on Saturday the 12th. That shoot was actually pretty crazy. The locations we shot at were beautiful but we almost got caught many, many times...I'm actually pretty surprised nobody called the cops on us.

Last Saturday I had a two hour "session" in this BDSM dungeon in Phoenix. It was absolutely amazing. I got to explore a whole different side of me. The dom used a whole bunch of BDSM toys on me including a violet wand (loved it), a posture collar (I actually loved not being able to see what was going on), and a suspension bar (I didn't go all the way off my feet, just on my tip toes). Unfortunately the dom used the whip so much on my lower back that one of my lower back dermal peircings flew off. I just got that fixed yesterday (it was incredibly painful since skin had grown over the anchor). I definitely plan on going to the dungeon more (probably about twice a month since it is kind of pricey).

I also found new male talent to use. We are going to discuss it more on Thursday I think. I don't think he has any experience shooting so I'm not sure how that is going to work. I was thinking about that this morning actually. Getting the video will be a lot easier than getting the photos (honestly I will probably only get enough photos to make the video cover page). I will have to borrow FTVRob's photo camera and just use a small HD video camera for the video.

This year has definitely been a year of improvement for me. Recently I've been working out a lot more (pretty much everyday actually). I've been eating healthier too. I've been waking up earlier and haven't been sleeping as much as I normally do. I've also noticed that I've been distancing myself from people that I think have a negative influence in my life. Saturday I am supposed to go to this sweat lodge for some ceremony. I'm not exactly sure what it is or how it works so I will have to write about it after I've done it.
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Old 03-25-2011, 10:32 PM   #147
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Mar. 25, 2010
Last Saturday night I attended a sweat lodge ceremony. My mom was all freaked out about it and tried talking me out of it (and even had my sister try talking me out of it too). I didn't really have any expectations of it and really didn't know what was going to happen. My friend who I went with didn't really tell me too much about it. I was kind of irritated too because when I went through the orientation I found out that I was going to have to speak out loud in front of everyone (that is a pretty hard thing for me to do...I hate public speaking and get incredibly nervous and shy around new people). It turned out pretty well. I now know what hot yoga feels like after having been in the steaming, hot sweat lodge with 20 other people. I'm not sure if it is something I am going to do again. I told my friend Theresa about it and she was thinking about doing it also (if she goes then I will probably go with her so she at least has someone there that she knows).

Other than that things have been pretty chill. I haven't been going out too much. Pretty much the only times I've gone out were when I was meeting up with friends to go eat. I'm kind of over the whole clubbing/partying scene....though I have had the urge to go dancing for the past week now.

Sunday I will be shooting a hardcore scene for the site. I'm kind of nervous about it because the male talent is going to be shooting it. Unfortunately he doesn't have any experience shooting so I have absolutely no idea how it is going to turn out. I am thinking I will probably make it a candid video update for a couple reasons (one being that we don't have a professional camera so we can't take pictures for the coverpage). I think that as long as the video isn't shaky and the lighting isn't too dark I will be happy.
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