[danielle_ftv]

May 11, 2011
Sorry that it's been so long since I've wrote a journal entry. School's over....yeah. My sister's 22nd birthday was last Sunday (same day as mother's day). We will be the same age until my birthday on the 29th. My sister love Outback Steakhouse so we went there for her birthday dinner/early mother's day celebration. For her presents I got her Chanel Mademoiselle perfume and tickets to go see some reggae concert. For my mom's mother's day present I got her a gift certificate to one of her favorite hair salons. I actually have to go pick the gift certificate up tomorrow since I wasn't able to get it on Saturday or Sunday. My dad's birthday is this weekend. We plan on going to a bbq joint for his birthday celebration. I got him a gift card to Amazon since I wasn't exactly sure what he wanted.

I took another "step" on my spiritual journey. A couple weeks ago I attended a healing circle ceremony. It was a pretty long ceremony (I was there from 5:30 to about 11 at night). I didn't do too much other than just sang some healing songs over and over again. It was a good experience but I don't think I will do another healing ceremony again unless it is for someone close to me.

Last Saturday (after shooting and my dinner with the family) I did another two hour BDSM session. This time it was a bit different than the last two sessions. We added a role play element into it. The master was a interrogator and I was a "lady of the court" who had stolen from the king and queen. I rented a 12th or 14th (I researched it but couldn't exactly pinpoint what century it was from) century dress. It was kind of hard to get into character at the beginning....I don't really consider myself an actress. I very much enjoyed it though. It was nice adding something new into my BDSM experiences. The master also did a lot of electric sex toy play. He had used the violet wand on me during the first two sessions and this session not only did he use that but he also added in some other electro sex device (I think it is a Mystim). During this session I was also fully suspended from my wrists (so my whole body was completely off the ground). I didn't care for that too much since I felt like my wrist was slipping out of the restraints. We also did a lot of wax play which I did during the first session but didn't like (I never really realized until that point that I have a fear of hot wax). It was incredibly difficult for me...mainly mentally, because I had to really focus on getting over my fear of hot wax. The whole reason I have a fear of hot wax is because when I was younger I accidentally dropped a whole cup full of incredibly hot melted candle wax all over my face, chest and arm. It scarred my face and I thought the scar would be there for life. Fortunately with a lot of care it went away. I am pretty bruised up right now (mostly on my thighs though). BTW when I do my sessions there is absolutely nothing sexual that happens. It really is only about BDSM. I think for some people it is difficult for them to realize that you can separate sex from BDSM...that they don't go hand in hand.

I really haven't been hanging out with my friends too much lately. I've notice that I've been leaving behind things that I thought had negative influences in my life. I've been spending more time with my friend Theresa (who I am going to the Sedona spiritual retreat not this weekend but next weekend with). It makes me a little sad that I'm not as close to Dallas as I once was. There is actually a possibility that she may not be coming to my birthday dinner celebration which saddens me even more. I just think it is interesting how people change and grow apart from other people they thought would be in their lives forever. I know I can always make more of an effort to spend more time with them but I think I am at a different place in life right now. I will be with them for Electric Daisy Carnival in Las Vegas next month. I still need to buy one of my costumes and make the other costume. One of the nights we are dressing up as the Village People. I will either goes as the biker or cop. The other night we are dressing up as daisies. That is the costume I am going to have to make.

I had to take Love Bug for her yearly vet exam. She had a ton of vaccinations to get done. Luckily she is healthy. The vet did tell me that I need to start brushing her teeth (I was using some teeth cleaning gel on her...but I guess that wasn't working too well). She does have really bad plaque build up in her back teeth...and really bad doggie breath which might be because the plaque.